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Mag.Meng on Twitter: "维也纳一个不抽烟,没有车的三口之家2018年一个月花费为:
在家做饭 700欧
交通120欧
电费 100欧
网络 30欧
手机 40欧
健身57欧
周末旅游300欧(每月1-2次)
下馆子 250欧
看电影50欧(每月1-2次)
买衣服 100欧
孩子幼儿园200欧(托管费+伙食费)
两室一厅的房子1200欧
共计3147欧"
numbers  family  money  vienna  europe  life 
25 days ago by aries1988
Liu Cixin’s War of the Worlds
For the Chinese, achieving parity with the West is a long-cherished goal, envisaged as a restoration of greatness after the humiliation of Western occupations and the self-inflicted wounds of the Mao era.

In 2015, China’s then Vice-President, Li Yuanchao, invited Liu to Zhongnanhai—an off-limits complex of government accommodation sometimes compared to the Kremlin—to discuss the books and showed Liu his own copies, which were dense with highlights and annotations.

Liu’s fellow sci-fi writers in China call him Da Liu—Big Liu—but he is small, with an unusually round head, which seems too large for his slight, wiry physique. He has the unassuming presence, belying an unflappable intelligence, of an operative posing as an accountant. Rarely making eye contact, he maintains an expression at once detached and preoccupied, as if too impatient for the future to commit his full attention to the present.

his father had turned him on to speculative fiction, giving him a copy of Jules Verne’s “Journey to the Center of the Earth.” To the young Liu, reading Verne’s book was like walking through a door to another world. “Everything in it was described with such authority and scrupulous attention to detail that I thought it had to be real,” Liu told me.

Although physics furnishes the novels’ premises, it is politics that drives the plots. At every turn, the characters are forced to make brutal calculations in which moral absolutism is pitted against the greater good. In their pursuit of survival, men and women employ Machiavellian game theory and adopt a bleak consequentialism. In Liu’s fictional universe, idealism is fatal and kindness an exorbitant luxury. As one general says in the trilogy, “In a time of war, we can’t afford to be too scrupulous.” Indeed, it is usually when people do not play by the rules of Realpolitik that the most lives are lost.

“What about individual liberty and freedom of governance?” He sighed, as if exhausted by a debate going on in his head. “But that’s not what Chinese people care about. For ordinary folks, it’s the cost of health care, real-estate prices, their children’s education. Not democracy.”

“Here’s the truth: if you were to become the President of China tomorrow, you would find that you had no other choice than to do exactly as he has done.”

It was an opinion entirely consistent with his systems-level view of human societies, just as mine reflected a belief in democracy and individualism as principles to be upheld regardless of outcomes.

When Liu is at his most relaxed, which is usually when he’s looking at, or learning about, something, he sounds almost like a child. There’s an upward lilt to his voice that suggests a kind of naïve wonder—someone happily lost in his own boundless curiosity.
interview  scifi  chinese  politics  today  history  bio  portrait  family 
28 days ago by aries1988
Opinion | Thirty Years After Tiananmen: Someone Always Remembers - The New York Times
This view is not limited to a few dissidents or foreign scholars, people out to make China look bad or who just can’t let bygones be bygones. The memory of Tiananmen is also being kept alive by people in China who believe that a government that uses force to stay in power is illegitimate.

History is also written with the smallest of gestures. Every spring I make a small trip to the Babaoshan cemetery in the western suburbs of Beijing to pay respects to two victims of the Tiananmen Square massacre
Four lines of the poem inscribed on the back of Xuehan’s tombstone explain, in a code of sorts, both the cause of his death and Xu Jue’s ritual:

Eight calla lilies
Nine yellow chrysanthemums
Six white tulips
Four red roses

Eight, nine, six, four. Year, month, day. June 4, 1989.

Two years ago, Ms. Xu died of cancer, at 77. Both years since, I’ve made the trip to the graves, thinking someone ought to put out the flowers. Each time, the 27 flowers were already there, tied in a neat bundle. Someone remembered. Someone always remembers.
1989/6/4  history  concept  minjian  people  china  censorship  family  death  memory  ritual  beijing 
4 weeks ago by aries1988
Ghosts of D-Day: The Civilian Casualties of the Battle of Normandy – BLARB
Most Germans had actually left Caen by June 6, a fact the Allies knew, prompting one British historian to call the bombing of Caen “close to a war crime;” there are also indications that some planes flew too high to hit their targets accurately. But my mother’s family was deeply grateful for the Allies. Living in Caen, they had suffered for four years under a regime of daily humiliations and threats, of near-starvation rations. None of the survivors I knew referred to the deaths of their loved ones as a crime. Caen was bombed in order to isolate the Germans by destroying lines of communication. To call that a war crime is to fall into the same black-and-white thinking that leads us to avoid mentioning civilian deaths in the first place.
ww2  normandie  death  war  tragedy  story  family 
5 weeks ago by aries1988
Letter of Recommendation Eavesdropping
Tuning in to the world around you can be insightful — and therapeutic.

there’s a danger in focusing too much on yourself: you risk losing the certainty that you’re not alone. Being too much in your own body can make you obsessive about your own problems, causing you to lose the ability to understand the scale of your own life compared with the lives of others.

Eavesdropping, however, helps you rejoin the world. People speak openly and honestly when they think no one is listening. When they talk about their issues with someone else, they go deeper than they would go on their own. You can compare your own life, then, with an unfiltered and honest rendering. It’s the ultimate vanity check: you’re not one in a million; you’re one of the millions.
habit  others  society  family 
11 weeks ago by aries1988
Thicker than blood: A young Chinese woman's coming of age - SupChina
Always careful about what I ate, she enforced an even stricter diet. Certain types of animal products must be avoided because they contained growth hormones. Some seeds and plants could only be consumed in small quantities because they stimulated the sexual organs, per traditional Chinese medicine. In addition to her belief that the flow of the womb drained the brain, my mother dreaded the approach of womanhood for her daughter, a perilous world filled with lurking eyes and wandering hands.

The only item my mother cleaned with a vengeance was our underwear. She rinsed them by hand, and she boiled them in water. The designated utensil was a large porcelain washbasin with a pair of mandarin ducks printed on the bottom next to the character for “double happiness.” The basin was a wedding gift for her and my father, typical of their time.

“Only boiling water can kill all the germs,” my mother explained her peculiar method. “That place must be kept clean, otherwise you will get diseases, and people will think you are a prostitute.”
body  female  growup  girl  story  mother  chinese  sex  food  tradition  family  education  marriage 
march 2019 by aries1988
潮州三母女:语言是纽带,是互相细看的眼睛
城市华灯初上,人潮在大马路聚集又散去,对于不少上班族来说,这意味一日的完结。但此时,郭咏琴卸下工作时的口齿伶俐、标准清晰的广东话,回到课室从咿咿吖吖的元音开始,重新拾回家乡的记忆和语言。下班接著上课的匆忙,随著踏入课室一刻,见到郭妈妈在后排留的座位而稍稍喘定。…
mother  daughter  learn  language  canton  family 
february 2019 by aries1988
三代同堂的育儿生活:血缘是家庭的最终归宿|深度|端传媒 Initium Media

妮妮对小弟弟的到来非常焦虑。只要我给弟弟喂奶,或者只是看了弟弟一眼,妮妮便会发出尖叫。李媛说,晚上是外公外婆带妮妮睡觉,但只要妮妮夜里醒来发现妈妈不在身边,就会哭喊。刺耳的哭闹声回荡在黑漆漆的夜里,又把峰峰惊醒,两个孩子接连陷入歇斯底里的状态,四个大人只能惺忪着睡眼,哄着、抱着、照顾着……

但是,没有任何一个爷爷奶奶、外公外婆会后悔亲手带大了自己的孙辈,李媛说,孩子是我和家人情感最重要的体现,血缘才是一个家庭最终的归宿。
parents  family  grandparent  today  china  generation  work  life  senior  retirement 
february 2019 by aries1988
Twitter
晚上吃的皖北地锅鸡有十三张桌子,夫妻俩经营,没有服务员,他们上四年级的孩子楼上楼下的帮忙端茶送菜加汤,收拾台面,表情不耐烦,却并没有怨言,他推着装满用过餐具的箱子,是一个小大人。
photo  restaurant  anhui  hefei  family 
january 2019 by aries1988
Two Roads for the New French Right | by Mark Lilla | The New York Review of Books

Unlike her hotheaded grandfather and aunt, Marion is always calm and collected, sounds sincere, and is intellectually inclined.

In countries as diverse as France, Poland, Hungary, Austria, Germany, and Italy, efforts are underway to develop a coherent ideology that would mobilize Europeans angry about immigration, economic dislocation, the European Union, and social liberalization, and then use that ideology to govern.

a new legal status, dubbed a pacte civil de solidarité (civil solidarity pact, or PACS), for long-term couples who required legal protections regarding inheritance and other end-of-life issues but did not want to get married.

While it’s true that fewer and fewer French people baptize their children and attend mass, nearly two thirds still identify as Catholic, and roughly 40 percent of those declare themselves to be practicing, whatever that means. More importantly, as a Pew study found last year, those French who do identify as Catholic—especially those who attend Mass regularly—are significantly more right-wing in their political views than those who do not.

The National Front is nearly as secular and even less ideologically coherent, having served more as a refuge for history’s detritus—Vichy collaborators, resentful pieds noirs driven out of Algeria, Joan of Arc romantics, Jew- and Muslim-haters, skinheads—than as a party with a positive program for France’s future. A mayor once close to it now aptly calls it the Dien Bien Phu right.

They share two convictions: that a robust conservatism is the only coherent alternative to what they call the neoliberal cosmopolitanism of our time, and that resources for such a conservatism can be found on both sides of the traditional left–right divide. More surprising still, they are all fans of Bernie Sanders.

Three months later her Institute of Social, Economic, and Political Sciences (ISSEP) opened in Lyon, with the aim, Marion said, of displacing the culture that dominates our nomadic, globalized, deracinated liberal system. It is basically a business school but will supposedly offer great books courses in philosophy, literature, history, and rhetoric, as well as practical ones on management and political and cultural combat.
reportage  politics  interview  france  conservatism  culture  ideology  conflict  globalization  crisis  morality  family  value  debate  instapaper_favs 
december 2018 by aries1988
“First Man,” Reviewed: Damien Chazelle’s Neil Armstrong Bio-Pic Is an Accidental Right-Wing Fetish Object | The New Yorker

First Man is worthy of enduring as a right-wing fetish object. It is a film of deluded, cultish longing for an earlier era of American life, one defined not by conservative politics but, rather, by a narrow and regressive emotional perspective that shapes and distorts the substance of the film.

the movie doesn’t stint on the distinctive Americanism of the action onscreen (including, in a scene of Armstrong ascending from the ground to the capsule of Apollo 11 in an elevator, a point-of-view shot that reveals, majestically, the words United States painted, vertically, on the side of the very tall rocket).

In its explicit content, and by artful omission, First Man subscribes to the misbegotten political premise that America used to be greater—and that the liberating and equalizing activism of the sixties ignored, dismissed, and even undermined that greatness.
critic  movie  rightwing  astronaut  nasa  society  usa  american  hollywood  hero  family  personality  children  death  moon  opinion  1960s 
october 2018 by aries1988
Paul Bloom on Cruelty – Econlib
I think that's one of the biggest mistakes we make about morality. I think that the reality is that fully appreciating someone's humanity opens up so many positive things--you can't be human without it; you can't have a decent relationship. It's the foundation of love, and friendship. But, it carries with it so many terrible risks. Really loving somebody, really knowing somebody opens up the possibility for love; but it also opens up the possibility for hatred.

we need to respect the fact that often we had no bad intentions and we will be right; and yet we can appreciate that our own small acts when accumulated makes people's lives miserable. And so we should stop these small acts.

The first point is that the robots are probably sentient. I mean, it's impossible to know. It's the standard, you know, undergraduate dormitory argument at 2 in the morning, how can I know you're conscious? How can you know that I'm conscious? But, these robots are of such sophistication, complexity, it beggars belief that they don't have feelings.
utilitarianism  human  cruel  thinking  movie  culture  debate  mind  other  love  family  morality  anger  incel  mob  robot 
october 2018 by aries1988
Korean 101 (or, How to Win Over Your Girlfriend in a Semester or Less) – BLARB
Like many Asian women in their homelands or abroad, Garam spoke to her mother on the phone daily, which let me learn about her family by osmosis.
learn  korean  usa  gaijin  family 
october 2018 by aries1988
History of Japan : Episode 248 - Family Matters
This week we take on the history of the von Siebold family -- father Philip Franz, son Alexander, and daughter Kusumoto Ine. How does the story of this unusual family fit in to the story of 19th century Japan?
family  japanese  japan  netherlands  history  medicine  study  gaijin 
september 2018 by aries1988
Pour Noël, la science en jeux
Des dinosaures, des médecins légistes, des automates à emballer : nous avons repéré pour les fêtes quelques jeux de sciences bien pensés, pour petits et grands.
jeu  family  buy 
july 2018 by aries1988
Twitter
RT : 'Labor shortage and low productivity were threatening the future of the Kato farm, on the Japanese island of Hokkai…
ai  video  japan  farming  population  crisis  youth  workforce  research  reportage  fromage  milk  robot  children  family 
may 2018 by aries1988
The Interpreter: A British crime drama bleeds into the real world
The researchers concluded that popular television shows’ portrayals of family life led to these changes by shifting public perceptions about the appropriate role of women.
Television isn’t new to Britain, of course. But in a world where media consumption is increasingly fragmented, popular shows are one of the few mass experiences left. That kind of shared understanding is rare, and it can be a powerful thing for politicians to take advantage of.
tv  africa  mentality  family  female  crime  uk  2018 
february 2018 by aries1988
In the Land of Vendettas That Go On Forever | VQR Online

These laws strike a responsive chord in us because that from which they arise is part of what C. G. Jung called our ‘collective unconscious,’ the phylogenetic, primordial, instinctual foundations of the human race.

he recognized and opined the perpetual instability of his country, the entrenched corruption, the way that, on bad days, it can seem as if there is no future here, that Albania’s collective unconscious is inconsonant, incompatible with modernizing forces—that the country resists, chokes itself.
nation  albania  crime  balkan  history  killing  family  honor 
february 2018 by aries1988
The Impossible Task of Remembering the Nanking Massacre

To return to my grandfather’s China now is to wade through a morass of collective memory. After the war, in response to the rise of Communism, America and Britain began to embrace post-war, pacifist Japan. To officials in the newly formed People’s Republic of China, Japan’s destruction of their beloved land was less relevant than the Nationalists’ colossal failure to protect it. My parents first learned about the war through films in which the Nationalists, who had borne the brunt of the fighting, simply ran away, leaving brave Communist guerrilla fighters and rural villagers to drive off cruel Japanese soldiers. In 1972, Tokyo signed a joint communiqué with Beijing that absolved Japan of all war reparations in exchange for recognizing Taiwan as an “inalienable” territory of China.

Though government officials call this a defense and disaster-prevention drill, Yaya considers it a more direct reminder: On September 18, 1931, Japan staged a bombing of a railway in then-Manchuria that instigated a 14-year long invasion. Remember it like this.
nanjing  ww2  family  memory 
december 2017 by aries1988
印尼炒饭

一个西裔女人招待他,拿过来一份菜单。他没有翻开,只问她,Nasi Goreng 有没有。女侍点头。他就说,好吧,就来一份Nasi Goreng, 一罐啤酒。

印尼炒饭,三年前他吃了整整两个月。那是个一月份,他上了一个雅加达的项目,印尼的一个客户寻求国际并购的机会。印尼是穆斯林社会,风气保守,晚上十一点,肚子饿,唯一开着的餐饮是路边大排档。大排档都一式一样,Chicken Satay, Gado Gado, Nasi Goreng. 所以他每个夜晚就吃这三样,烤鸡肉串,加多加多色拉, 印尼炒饭,配一瓶啤酒。他坐在大排档的塑料棚下面,雨点打在棚面响声如雷。店主在一口大锅前不停翻炒,脸上不停滴下水,不知是汗还是雨。老板娘收钱、擦桌子,扫地,兜里的钱票子都是湿的。大排档粗陋,盐不是放多就是放少,还要不就是没调开, 一口淡一口咸,镬气倒是十足,火候好。他就坐在那条塑料板凳上,这三样吃了两个月。

现在他老婆短发,他的发迹线有点太高。第一只猫头鹰已经被女儿睡得太脏。他知道第二个孩子降生时,老婆会兴高采烈地给他拿出第二只猫头鹰,那一只也会无可挽回地变脏、掉毛。那家做猫头鹰的玩具厂已经倒闭,这种玩具再也买不到了;因为Bill Murray而走红世界的日本威士忌,很多牌子已经卖脱销,十几年内不会有新货。想起这两件事情,他有点伤感。

除了加班和带孩子,他们剩下的可怜的空闲时间都用来看新房和谈房贷,孩子越来越大,必须搬到好学区住才行。对于婚姻,他常常想起Before Midnight,那么烦躁,零碎,温吞吞,缓慢地死去,“也许就和化疗一样”,他有一次这么想到。他疲惫不堪,他老婆恐怕更累,却无法不去爱这一切:毕竟,他们用Lost in Translation里猫头鹰的名字命名了两个孩子:Louise 和Luis。

他还记得自己做过一个春梦,什么情节都没有,只有这个暗恋对象,在洗手台面前,一遍一遍缓慢地拧毛巾。
story  douban  love  sex  memory  nostalgia  melancholy  life  marriage  family  man  youth  middle-age  indonesia  food  work  california 
december 2017 by aries1988
异乡人──胡清心:异议者的修炼,是坚持跟内心黑暗打仗|深度|端传媒 Initium Media
我总认为自己是天生反动的,文革也算了解,因为父母在那段时间吃过苦,而自小在基督教家庭教会成长,政权的凶险也是亲身经历,不过宗教自由等论辩无从说起,只是觉得这个政权和政党对我们充满敌意。可是,遇见那些头头是道为政权维护的人,辩着辩着反倒自觉理亏,好像自己对共产党的不满,只是出于私人恩怨。

然后,思考的深度就停留在这里。这些问题太难回答,而在公民身份和政治生活被刻意淡化的环境中,确实找不到足以让我系统地整理自己的感受与想法的框架。日常生活有太多琐碎与精彩充斥,对社会政治的思考就算一晃而过,也匆匆被束之高阁。
self  learn  politics  thinking  china  story  family  1989/6/4 
november 2017 by aries1988
A Stranger at the Family Table | The New Yorker

fundamentally, we are a traditional Chinese family, and this is no more clearly seen than in the way we interact with one another, in the things we reveal about ourselves. We do not admit weakness or sadness. Romantic heartbreak, depression, existential doubts—those are topics of conversation that belong to different cultures and younger generations, educated people who know about Freud and psychotherapy and organic vegetables. Vulnerability is shameful, even taboo; and in the spectrum of human shortcomings, poverty is the greatest frailty. All that is broken must remain in the past.

With my cousins in rural Perak and Kelantan, I spoke a pidgin of Malay, Mandarin, English, and Cantonese. I became quite skilled quite young at modulating my speech to suit whomever I was speaking to. I knew what proportion of Malay or Mandarin or colloquial English to use, and in what situation, knew when to swear in Cantonese, knew when to be correct, when to be urban-cool, when to be country-direct.
banyan  family  story  children  hardship  immigrant  mentality  grandparent  parents  malaysia 
november 2017 by aries1988
Letter of Recommendation Cabbages and Kings
A game that’s actually fun to play with your children.

I love my children and love being with them — in theory. But in practice, you must fill those hours of togetherness with something that doesn’t make you or your children squirm with impatience.

most of the stuff you can do with children is terrible. Kids’ board games are bad. Pretending to be pirates or whatever is bad. Crafts are bad. Playing sports with kids is bad until about age 13, when the opposing trajectories of your athletic abilities and your child’s athletic abilities intersect, and then it’s good for like a week, and then they reliably crush you, and it’s bad again.

They play cards so differently, befitting their personalities: the older in a constant state of simmering rage at the unjustness of everyone else’s moves, which turns, in the moment of victory, to benevolent forgiveness; the younger silently, watchfully processing the game and then making a surprising and intuitive move to defeat us all.
idea  moi  train  travel  family  card  game  fun  parents  kid 
november 2017 by aries1988
Letter of Recommendation Dunking

Those first few dips completely changed the way I eat at family meals. Part of what won me over was the pleasure of the thing itself: Wine-soaked bread is sharp, puckery and delicious, a double hit of fermented tang.

Rather than yielding to temptation for a second helping of anything, it’s far wiser to melt a bite of Chianti on your tongue instead.

the first time I watched my teacher at weekend Spanish school do the same with pieces of cheese and hot chocolate — a popular Colombian treat — on a recess break, I nearly gagged.
food  experience  experiment  culture  fun  family  gaijin  drinking  idea  discovery 
october 2017 by aries1988
The Legacy Of The Mississippi Delta Chinese : NPR
"We were in-between," Wong explains, "right in between the blacks and the whites. We're not black, we're not white. So that by itself gives you some isolation."

Wong remembers hearing ethnic slurs as he grew up, which he got used to ignoring. But the family felt more pernicious discrimination, too. Wong remembers a time of big excitement when he was young: The family was finally going to get to move out of the cramped grocery store. His father had found a house he wanted to buy, in a white neighborhood.

Then suddenly, that conversation stopped. There would be no deal. Later, his father told him that the white residents had made it quite clear they didn't want Chinese in their neighborhood.

That's been the story of many Delta Chinese: Work hard. Send your kids to college. Watch them move away.
chinese  tradition  immigrant  usa  south  story  family  business  cuisine 
august 2017 by aries1988
Growing Up As An Untouchable
What I was told was that we were Christians. Christians, untouchables—it came to the same thing. All Christians in India were untouchable, as far as I knew (though only a small minority of all untouchables are Christian).

Christians, untouchables—it came to the same thing. All Christians in India were untouchable, as far as I knew (though only a small minority of all untouchables are Christian).

I knew no Christian who did not turn servile in the presence of a Hindu. I knew no Hindu who did not look right through a Christian man standing in front of him as if he did not exist.

Excerpted from Ants Among Elephants: An Untouchable Family and the Making of Modern India by Sujatha Gidla. Published by Farrar, Straus and Giroux. Copyright © 2017 by Sujatha Gidla. All rights reserved.
india  book  story  family  caste  revolution  religion  children  teenager 
august 2017 by aries1988
D.I.Y. Artificial Intelligence Comes to a Japanese Family Farm
The Koikes have been growing cucumbers in Kosai, a town wedged between the Pacific Ocean and the brackish Lake Hamana, for nearly fifty years.

For his project, he used TensorFlow, which Google released to the public in 2015.

He began by building a custom photo stand, which allowed him to photograph each cucumber from three angles. Then, to analyze the images, he adapted a popular piece of TensorFlow software used for recognizing handwritten numerals. Before he could turn the A.I. loose, though, Koike had to train it. He captured seven thousand photos of cucumbers that his mother had already sorted, then used the data to teach his software to recognize which vegetables belonged in which categories. Finally, he built an automated conveyor-belt system to move each cucumber from the photo stand to the bin designated by the program.
agriculture  ai  business  city  countryside  engineering  example  family  japanese  story 
august 2017 by aries1988
Plus que cinq dodos sans les enfants !
Toute l’année, on attend les vacances pour souffler un peu et prendre du temps pour soi. Mais le moment de la séparation est redouté tant par les parents que par leur progéniture.
parents  children  education  self  family  couple  vacation 
august 2017 by aries1988
Letter of Recommendation Karaoke at Home
Solo singing as an antidote to bullying, racism and rage.
story  immigrant  family  usa  chinese  growup  teenager  singer  hobby 
july 2017 by aries1988
Thomas Pesquet : « Quand on aperçoit l’ISS, c’est “Star Wars” ! »

la pollution atmosphérique – je n’ai jamais pu prendre une photo de Pékin, par exemple. Voir tout cela, non plus seulement l’intellectualiser, ça change quelque chose.

L’aviation, l’espace, étaient-ils vos rêves de gamin ?

Quand j’avais 4 ans, c’est un de mes premiers souvenirs, mon père m’avait fabriqué un vaisseau spatial avec des cartons. Il avait placé des coussins dedans, un manche et un cadran sur le rabat. J’y ai passé du temps, dans ma navette spatiale en carton, jusqu’à ce qu’elle parte à la poubelle parce que je ne voulais pas venir manger…

Plus tard, avec mon frère, on allait à la maison de la presse acheter des magazines d’aviation. J’adorais les posters avec des « écorchés » d’avion, on détaillait leur structure, on avait tous les éléments, ça faisait un peu comme les Lego Technic. Toute mon adolescence, j’ai continué à lire, à regarder des films sur l’aviation, mais je n’ai jamais pris l’avion et je ne connaissais personne dans ce milieu.
story  astronaut  français  children  science  family  school  education 
june 2017 by aries1988
Et vous, voterez-vous comme vos parents ?

Qu’il soit accepté ou rejeté, l’héritage parental est très présent au moment de choisir son candidat. Cette élection si surprenante favorise aussi des échanges riches en famille, même en cas de désaccords.

Des aïeux héroïques continuent parfois d’inspirer des choix politiques : résistants chez des gaullistes, républicains espagnols chez des communistes… Et plus généralement des bribes de conversations, des habitudes prises par imprégnation.

Cette dernière crée plutôt un lien, même en cas de désaccord. « C’est le sujet qui nous permet de communiquer, de nous engueuler, de s’opposer de façon légitime, et aussi sans doute de faire passer de l’émotion sans être dans l’intime », relate Nancy, 47 ans. « Mon père m’appelle tous les jours pour me convaincre de voter Macron, raconte Julien, 21 ans, qui prévoit de voter Hamon. Ce sont les conversations les plus substantielles que j’ai eues avec lui. »
family  français  politics  heritage  children  parents 
april 2017 by aries1988
Experience: I accidentally bought a giant pig

By the time we realised her size, we were in love. She’s unlike any animal I’ve met. Her intelligence is unbelievable. She’s house trained and even opens the back door with her snout to let herself out to pee. Her food is mainly kibble, plus fruit and vegetables. Her favourite treat is a cupcake. She’s bathed regularly and pigs don’t sweat, so she doesn’t smell.

It was emotional realising she was a commercial pig. The more we discovered about what her life could have been, it seemed crazy to us that we ate animals, so we stopped.
pig  pet  story  home  lgbt  family  animal  food  ethic  vegetarian 
march 2017 by aries1988
壁下观 #39: 「观二代」是怎么养成的

育儿兹事体大,如今各类育儿经验和教学文章越来越多,而中国教育体系里一向疲弱的美育,也越来越受到新一代父母的重视。以「壁下观」为宗旨的主播们,是如何培养自己的「观二代」的?超人夫妇的女儿在四个月大时就已经踏足壁下,四处观赏壁画、雕像、古建筑。本期我们就来听听她们的育儿观。
children  travel  driving  family  fun  art  history  china  kid 
february 2017 by aries1988
Edouard Louis : « Trump et le FN sont le produit de l’exclusion »

Quand j’arrive à Amiens, je suis entouré de lycéens d’un autre milieu social que le mien, plus riches, plus décontractés. Ce sont eux qui commencent à m’appeler Edouard – pour eux, « Eddy » ne peut être qu’un diminutif. Au début je résiste.

Puis je comprends que ce prénom peut réaliser l’écart que je cherche par rapport à l’enfant que j’ai été. Qu’il peut être le lieu de la ré-invention. Un nom est aussi une histoire, et chaque fois que j’entendais « Eddy », j’entendais « pauvre », « pédé ». C’est comme ça que ça commence. Par le prénom.

Je leur avais dit que désormais, je m’appelais Edouard, et ça se passait très mal. « Eddy », c’est le nom que m’a donné mon père : j’étais son premier fils, et il était fou des films et des séries américaines – de l’Amérique en général. Un autre souvenir, un des plus forts de ma vie : je dois être en CM1, je rentre de l’école. Mon père est devant la télé, on est le 11 septembre 2001 et je vois les tours jumelles en flammes. Et mon père pleure, pleure – lui qui ne voulait jamais pleurer parce qu’il était un homme… Il a pleuré pendant des jours, il avait l’impression que c’était son monde qui s’effondrait. Alors abandonner Eddy pour m’appeler Edouard, c’était très violent pour eux. C’était laisser tout ça derrière moi.

c’est une condition de la littérature : aussitôt que vous écrivez sur les gens, ils ne se reconnaissent pas dans ce que vous dites, parce que la littérature vise justement à opérer un décalage par rapport à la réalité immédiatement perceptible.

Trump, le Brexit, le FN, tout ça est le produit d’un même phénomène : l’exclusion. Une grande partie de ceux que j’ai côtoyés dans mon enfance votent aujourd’hui pour le FN, et quand ils le font, ils disent : « C’est parce que Le Pen est la seule à parler de nous. » Le vote pour Trump et le FN est comme une tentative désespérée pour exister dans le regard des autres. Si la politique ne se transforme pas, si les exclus se sentent encore plus exclus parce que personne ne parle d’eux, si une large partie de la littérature continue à s’intéresser seulement à la bourgeoisie blanche, ce phénomène s’amplifiera.
interview  français  literature  writer  family  politics  lgbt 
january 2017 by aries1988
The Woman Who Might Find Us Another Earth - The New York Times
Widowhood was like a new universe for Seager to explore. She had never understood many social norms. The celebration of birthdays, for instance. “I just don’t see the point,” she says. “Why would I want to celebrate my birthday? Why on earth would I even care?” She had also drawn a hard line against Christmas and its myths. “I never wanted my kids to believe in Santa.” After Wevrick’s death, she became even more of a satellite, developing a deeper intolerance for life’s ordinary concerns.
female  scientist  planet  life  story  research  discovery  family  couple 
december 2016 by aries1988
The Spanish Lesson I Never Got at School

With Spanish’s endearments and ample use of the subjunctive tense and the diminutive, I have learned that to know a language is to enter into another way of being.

My father, for example, is a charming man in English, a language he has spoken fluently for a half-century. In Spanish, however, his full talents as a sardonic raconteur are on display; he’s even prone to the occasional philosophical soliloquy. My mother is a fluent English speaker, but in Spanish she’s a storyteller with a deeply romantic bent and a flair for the ironic.

For Latino immigrant children, Spanish is the key that unlocks the untranslatable wisdom of their elders, and that reveals the subtle truths in their family histories. It’s a source of self-knowledge, a form of cultural capital. They are smarter, in fact, for each bit of Spanish they keep alive in their bilingual brains. And they are more likely to see the absurdity in the rants of xenophobes and racists.
children  language  education  school  bilingual  opinion  politics  usa  espagna  family  literature  personality  brain 
november 2016 by aries1988
Aberfan - 50 years on

It was a normal October day for a small mining village, where it had been raining for what seemed like forever
story  disaster  children  school  wales  death  comparison  coal  mining  accident  closure  ptsd  family  tragedy 
october 2016 by aries1988
Andrew Sullivan: My Distraction Sickness — and Yours

At your desk at work, or at home on your laptop, you disappeared down a rabbit hole of links and resurfaced minutes (or hours) later to reencounter the world. But the smartphone then went and made the rabbit hole portable, inviting us to get lost in it anywhere, at any time, whatever else we might be doing. Information soon penetrated every waking moment of our lives.

My breathing slowed. My brain settled. My body became much more available to me. I could feel it digesting and sniffing, itching and pulsating. It was if my brain were moving away from the abstract and the distant toward the tangible and the near.

Remember, my friend Sam Harris, an atheist meditator, had told me before I left, if you’re suffering, you’re thinking.

If you’re watching a football game with your son while also texting a friend, you’re not fully with your child — and he knows it. Truly being with another person means being experientially with them, picking up countless tiny signals from the eyes and voice and body language and context, and reacting, often unconsciously, to every nuance. These are our deepest social skills, which have been honed through the aeons. They are what make us distinctively human.

in a controlled and sequestered world that exists largely free of the sudden eruptions or encumbrances of actual human interaction.

The reason we live in a culture increasingly without faith is not because science has somehow disproved the unprovable, but because the white noise of secularism has removed the very stillness in which it might endure or be reborn.

From the moment I entered a church in my childhood, I understood that this place was different because it was so quiet.

this silence demarcated what we once understood as the sacred, marking a space beyond the secular world of noise and business and shopping.

The only place like it was the library, and the silence there also pointed to something beyond it — to the learning that required time and patience, to the pursuit of truth that left practical life behind.

Has our enslavement to dopamine — to the instant hits of validation that come with a well-crafted tweet or Snapchat streak — made us happier?

just as modern street lighting has slowly blotted the stars from the visible skies, so too have cars and planes and factories and flickering digital screens combined to rob us of a silence that was previously regarded as integral to the health of the human imagination.
technology  culture  internet  meditation  distraction  essay  attention  habit  reading  information  brain  silence  thinking  family  today 
september 2016 by aries1988
My Father, the YouTube Star
https://www.instapaper.com/read/754795268

As a child who immigrated from Hong Kong, I was raised as an American during the day and Chinese after school. I brought home Western ideas that confounded my parents: sarcasm, irony, recalcitrance.

Our relationship reached a plateau of cordial indifference: We lived 2,000 miles apart and talked on the phone once a week about nothing important at all.

The videos are earnest and adorably cheese-ball, bearing the production tropes of ’80s VHS: There are spinning wipe effects, gratuitous zooms, saccharine background music.

Watching through nearly two dozen more videos, I realized every single dish had been served in my childhood home. Macau-style Portuguese coconut chicken. Pan-fried turnip cake. Sweet-and-sour pork. This time, the wave of nostalgia washed over me: I was 12 again, sitting at the kitchen table, my family’s mouths too preoccupied to squabble.

The only thing your mom had left was the memory of her taste. We’re afraid that if you wanted to eat your childhood dishes, and one day we’re both no longer around, you wouldn’t know how to cook it.
parents  distance  telephone  family  food  usa  gaijin  memory  record  video  instapaper_favs 
july 2016 by aries1988
What makes train travel such an antidote to life’s stresses? | Aeon Essays
trains blurred the line between public and private. ‘Train travel requires people to do private things in public,’

And what’s fascinating about it is the possibility of being able to observe strangers. For women in particular who don’t have a lot of geographic mobility in urban spaces, riding on a train is as close as they can get to that flâneur experience of urban life – where you can sit and you can watch people and you can eavesdrop on conversations.’

When, several years ago, I returned to Russia after a long absence, I booked a 24-hour train journey for myself and my eight-year-old daughter from St Petersburg to Odessa in Ukraine. I wanted her to experience what I remembered: a whole day together, an uninterrupted passage of hours filled with books and conversations, an opportunity to spend time entirely on ourselves, by ourselves, and with ourselves.

Just like my mother more than 30 years earlier, I packed boiled eggs, tomatoes, cucumbers, bread, cheese and apples. We ate all three meals together without television, telephone or the internet. When the conductor brought tea – much like I remembered from the Sochi express times, with two cubes of sugar, in a classic railway cup – we drank it with sweets we bought at an intermediate stop, looked out of the window, and talked.
essay  train  travel  transport  story  russia  family  nostalgia  history  people  female 
july 2016 by aries1988
Words of Obama’s Father Still Waiting to Be Read by His Son
Relatives have described Barack Obama Sr. as a complicated man, brilliant and imperious, charming and brash, who began to drink heavily as his dreams of becoming one of Kenya’s leading government economists foundered. He died in a car crash at age 46 without ever fulfilling his early promise.

President Obama often describes his life as an only-in-America saga, the improbable rise of the son of a white woman from Kansas and a black man from Kenya to the American presidency. But his father’s ascent was astounding, too, as he journeyed from the dusty roads of his rural village to the halls of Harvard.
story  family  parents  obama 
june 2016 by aries1988
小公务员之死
我姐夫临终以前跟我说让我给他写挽联,他说你字好。我这个人一辈子就好一个穷讲究,说完他看着天花板微笑着。
cancer  death  family  story  instapaper_favs 
may 2016 by aries1988
Class Consciousness - The New Yorker
One day, an Australian couple came to the restaurant. The man, thin and ascetic, with piercing eyes, started talking about an idealistic education system that had been introduced in Central Europe in the early twentieth century. Emphasizing the need to help children develop as individuals, it was based on ideas of reincarnation, free will, and individuality. After four days, the couple left, encouraging Harry and Li to stay in touch.

Steiner developed his educational philosophy in 1919, when the owner of the Waldorf-Astoria cigarette factory, in Stuttgart, asked him to set up a school for the employees’ children. Germany was in turmoil—a revolution followed the end of the First World War—and the new school was intended as a corrective to the harsh discipline of traditional schools. Steiner believed that children should be slowly guided out of what he termed “the etheric world,” where they existed prior to birth, and that education should engage first the hands, then the heart, then the brain. Waldorf-educated children play a lot when they’re young, and often don’t learn to read until second or third grade. After nearly a decade of studying Steiner’s system, Harry and Li returned to Chengdu, to start China’s first Waldorf school.
china  education  future  children  story  chinese  family  choice  kid  theory  debate  pioneer  moi  instapaper_favs 
april 2016 by aries1988
How to be a 21st-century dad - FT.com
And standards for next-generation fathers will be higher. The younger the father, the more time he is likely to spend with his kids, found the Families and Work Institute in the US. There’s a lot of research to show millennial men give high priority to their role as dads. Mums still do most childcare but, among millennials, gender roles are unprecedentedly blurred.

This will mean more fathers forgoing the ego boosts conferred by careers. My TV series may never get written. In theory that’s OK, because endless hours with the children are what life is really about. In truth, I sometimes feel a secret twinge of nostalgia for the 1950s.
work  family  children  life  choice  moi 
february 2016 by aries1988
The mystery of China’s missing brides - FT.com
“According to Chen Wuqing, a specialist in gender studies at the Chinese Academy of Social Sciences in Beijing, men like Li are “just the tip of the wave”. Currently, he says, the ratio of marriage-age men to women nationwide shows no real extremes; 105 men per 100 women is actually remarkably close to the world average. Even the ratio of men to women in the 20-24 age bracket was 109 nationwide in 2013, which is not excessive. But the statistics for younger children are truly disturbing: between 117-118 males per 100 females for all age categories under 14.”

““Living here, I see that the husbands do almost everything,” she said. “They have to work and the women at home just play mahjong. In Vietnam women aren’t supposed to spend all day playing cards.”
story  vietnam  chinese  money  family  youth  rural  marriage 
december 2015 by aries1988
Motherhood, Screened Off
The problem with smartphones isn’t their ubiquity. It’s their opacity.

With my choice of e-book over hardcover, I had unwittingly cast myself as a familiar, much-maligned character: the mom who is blind to the daily pleasures of parenting, focused instead on some diversion which, by virtue of its taking place on that phone, is inherently trivial. The phone cruelly reduces even the worthiest of escapes to one more bit of busywork.

The difference is that those tasks, by virtue of not all transpiring on one opaque device, were tangible and thus felt legitimate.
parents  children  gadget  iphone  story  parenting  family  life 
november 2015 by aries1988
China’s One-Child Policy
A look at how China’s restrictions on the size of families changed over the years.
history  news  china  photo  children  family 
october 2015 by aries1988
The Myth of Quality Time

I know how my 80-year-old father feels about dying, religion and God not because I scheduled a discrete encounter to discuss all of that with him. I know because I happened to be in the passenger seat of his car when such thoughts were on his mind and when, for whatever unforeseeable reason, he felt comfortable articulating them.
family  love  story 
september 2015 by aries1988
Inside a Chinese Test-Prep Factory
In town, where the rest of the students live, mostly with their mothers in tiny partitioned rooms, the local government has shut down all forms of entertainment. This may be the only town in China with no video arcade, billiards hall or Internet cafe. “There’s nothing to do but study,” Yang says.

The Maotanchang school began humbly, in 1939, as a temporary oasis for students escaping the Japanese invasion of Hefei, Anhui’s capital.

There is, students note, one high-tech device: an electronic fingerprint scanner that teachers log into every night to verify that they have conducted their obligatory bed checks.
reportage  gaokao  student  family  life 
april 2015 by aries1988
39 Hours Inside The Biggest Human Migration On Earth
Looking across this sea of anxious faces, it’s easy to forget this is a holiday. Knotted brows frame weary eyes in a crowd as deep as a football field, all of them waiting to catch a train out of Beijing.

The mass exodus from China’s cities is the roaring crescendo leading up to Chinese New Year, or Spring Festival as it’s known in the country. On paper the holiday can be equated to Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year’s rolled into one, but on the ground the holiday unfolds on an entirely different scale.

Even in the dead of night, fluorescent lights in the hard seat compartment never shut off. It’s a policy with a purpose — total darkness in a packed car would be an invitation to mayhem — but the unceasing illumination presents passengers waking at 4 a.m. with a Pompeii-esque tableau: hundreds of men, women and children slumped unconscious across the booths, sinks and stairwells.
gaijin  chinese  holiday  family  train  photo  xinjiang  reportage  story 
february 2015 by aries1988
Xiaomi's Ambition - stratechery by Ben Thompson
There is a younger generation, though, the Xiaomi generation, that has grown up in a country that has been growing by near double digits every year they have been alive. To their minds of course China is a global power, and why wouldn’t they embrace Chinese brands? Xiaomi is tapping into that nationalistic bent, and the red star on their mascot’s hat couldn’t be less subtle:
chinese  family  money  consumer  home  app  business  analysis 
january 2015 by aries1988
Le désarroi d'une prof qui parle de
Lisez l'article : Le désarroi d'une prof qui parle de "Charlie" à ses élèves sur votre mobile.
france  children  future  family 
january 2015 by aries1988
What Wikipedia Taught Me About My Grandfather
On June 6, 1989, my grandfather looked at me and lifted his spoon. Between us was a bowl of lightly sugared fruit. He took a breath, stared down the 9-year-old…
story  scientist  family  wikipedia 
november 2014 by aries1988
Norway the Slow Way
In the past, Norway was relatively (and I mean relatively) cheap compared to Sweden and Denmark — Swedes would come to buy products in Norway and Norwegians would go to Sweden to work. But then oil reserves were discovered off Norway’s coast in 1969, and everything changed. The youngest child had suddenly become rich. One of the byproducts of this sudden influx of capital has been an intensive modernization in nearly all sectors of Norwegian life. Just 20 years ago, Oslo was a sleepy, provincial town known mainly for annually handing out the Nobel Peace Prize. Today, it is Europe’s fastest-growing capital. Everywhere you look, skyscrapers are being thrown up
culture  explained  family  norge  scandinavia  story  tv  travel 
september 2014 by aries1988
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