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aries1988 : grandparent   2

三代同堂的育儿生活:血缘是家庭的最终归宿|深度|端传媒 Initium Media

妮妮对小弟弟的到来非常焦虑。只要我给弟弟喂奶,或者只是看了弟弟一眼,妮妮便会发出尖叫。李媛说,晚上是外公外婆带妮妮睡觉,但只要妮妮夜里醒来发现妈妈不在身边,就会哭喊。刺耳的哭闹声回荡在黑漆漆的夜里,又把峰峰惊醒,两个孩子接连陷入歇斯底里的状态,四个大人只能惺忪着睡眼,哄着、抱着、照顾着……

但是,没有任何一个爷爷奶奶、外公外婆会后悔亲手带大了自己的孙辈,李媛说,孩子是我和家人情感最重要的体现,血缘才是一个家庭最终的归宿。
parents  family  grandparent  today  china  generation  work  life  senior  retirement 
february 2019 by aries1988
A Stranger at the Family Table | The New Yorker

fundamentally, we are a traditional Chinese family, and this is no more clearly seen than in the way we interact with one another, in the things we reveal about ourselves. We do not admit weakness or sadness. Romantic heartbreak, depression, existential doubts—those are topics of conversation that belong to different cultures and younger generations, educated people who know about Freud and psychotherapy and organic vegetables. Vulnerability is shameful, even taboo; and in the spectrum of human shortcomings, poverty is the greatest frailty. All that is broken must remain in the past.

With my cousins in rural Perak and Kelantan, I spoke a pidgin of Malay, Mandarin, English, and Cantonese. I became quite skilled quite young at modulating my speech to suit whomever I was speaking to. I knew what proportion of Malay or Mandarin or colloquial English to use, and in what situation, knew when to swear in Cantonese, knew when to be correct, when to be urban-cool, when to be country-direct.
banyan  family  story  children  hardship  immigrant  mentality  grandparent  parents  malaysia 
november 2017 by aries1988

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