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dirtystylus : genderroles   23

The long history of the hand-washing gender gap.
Women were always at the center of hygiene improvement efforts. The public health workers who went to tenements and farms to preach this “gospel of germs” as visiting nurses, social workers, and home economists were often women. And under this new way of thinking, mothers were supposed to be the role models for the entire family—teaching hand-washing, stopping men from spitting in the house, and keeping anyone from kissing their babies. The health department in Newark, New Jersey, sent a bib to every baby born in the city in 1929 that had the legend “I don’t want to be sick, please do not kiss me.” (This is a gift I suspect some contemporary parents would appreciate in this year of bad flu.)

The job of hygiene gatekeeper came somewhat naturally to Victorian women and their daughters, who were used to the expectation that they’d be the moral instructors of their households, but it could still be an unpleasant one. Tomes read correspondence between home economists and women who wrote that older family members mocked them for their new ideas, and refused to stop sharing spoons and plates with their babies or chewing bites of food before giving them to the infants. “Spitting also became a useful tactic for men to annoy hygiene-conscious ladies,” Tomes wrote, even after a full decade of anti-tuberculosis crusaders exhorting men to stop expectorating on the street, on public transport, and even (shudder) inside the home.
via:jordan  history  health  coronavirus  gender  genderroles  equity 
6 weeks ago by dirtystylus
Gabrielle Blair on Twitter: "When I hear men worshipping guns and talking about how there’s nothing that will stop them from defending their family, my mind goes to Naaman in the Bible. Do you remember Naaman? He was a great military leader, and he also
When I hear men worshipping guns and talking about how there’s nothing that will stop them from defending their family, my mind goes to Naaman in the Bible. Do you remember Naaman? He was a great military leader, and he also had leprosy.
The prophet told him to bathe in the Jordan River 7 times to be cured. He refused. In fact he was pissed off the cure was so simple. So his servants said: If he’d asked you to do some great thing, you would have done it, but you’re not willing to go bathe in the water?
That’s like men bragging about how they’re ready and willing to protect their family. They're picturing doing *some great thing*, but protecting your family is almost always much more mundane.

A few conversations with God to illustrate:
Conversation #1:

Man: Hey God, I just want you to know I am committed to protecting my family at all costs.

God: Gosh, that’s great to hear.

One of the main things I need you to do to protect your family is laundry. Tons of laundry. You know kids...
— they’re so susceptible to infections and viruses. Pinworms, athlete’s foot, lice, strep throat, colds and flues. Pneumonia and diarrhea are *serious killers* of children under five. The list is endless. So you’re going to need to do laundry pretty much daily.
Launder their socks & underwear, their sheets. Put their sneakers through the wash. I can’t emphasize this enough: protecting your family involves a lot of laundry.

Man: Oh. Um.

I was thinking more along the lines of a masked intruder with a gun at 2 AM raping my family.
God: First of all, stop fantasizing about your family being raped.

Second, do you know the stats on break-ins? The vast majority happen when no one is home, and only a small percentage are armed. Home alarms and dogs reduce the risk even more.
Even if you do end up being the rare house with an armed-break-in-while-home, you want to shoot someone for over your TV? Isn't that a ridiculous overreaction?

You’re not in the mob. I assure you there’s a slim-to-none chance you’ll need to defend your family at gun point.
If you really want to protect your family, laundry is where I need you to focus.

Man: But. But.

I bought all these guns. And ammunition. And I’m telling you, if anyone threatens my family, I’ll be ready.
God: Is there anything you’re willing to do to protect your family that’s not the plot of an action/thriller?

Man:

God:

Man:

God: Sigh.

10/
Conversation #2:

God: I’d like you to protect your family.

Man: You bet. I’m ready. If anyone touches my kids, they are dead meat.

God. Okay. Well, to protect your family, the thing I need you to do is teach thorough hand-washing.

11/
Basically, you’ll need to carefully wash your kids’ hands several times a day until they’re old enough to do it themselves. At that point you’ll need to supervise the hand-washing for several years until you know they’ve mastered it.

12/
And from then on, you just need to spend another ten years asking them to wash their hands multiple times a day — before school, after school, before meals, after potty breaks, etc.. Cool?

Man: Well. Um.

Is there an assignment that’s more related to guns?

13/
God: Nope. The main thing is hand-washing.

Having guns in the house actually puts your kids in harm’s way. Surely, as a protective parent, you’ve read about the dangers of keeping and storing guns at home?

Man:

14/
God: Let me guess. If I need someone to dig a hole on an asteroid, plant a bomb in the hole to blow up the asteroid, in order to save the Earth, you’ll be first in line.

Man: HECK YES

God:

Man:

God: Helpful.

15/
Conversation #3:

Man: I’m ready to defend my family!! My guns and ammunition are stocked.

God: So glad to hear you’re ready to defend your family. Here’s the key thing I need you to do: Never drink alcohol again.

Man: Wait. What?

16/
God: Well I’m sure you know motor vehicle accidents and gun accidents are top killers of children. And mixing alcohol with driving or guns makes them far riskier. If you’ve been drinking, there’s a higher likelihood you’ll drive drunk, lose your temper and hurt the kids...

17/
... or just be irresponsible with your gun. So if you want to protect your family, I would recommend giving up alcohol as a good way to start.

Man:

God:

Man: Can’t I just shoot some bad guys?

God: So then, NOT actually interested in protecting your family.

18/
Conversation #4:

God: Are you ready and willing to protect your family?

Man: YES. Come at me. My house is fully armed and I keep a handgun under the passenger seat. I am READY.

God: Oh. Well. The thing I need you to do is feed your kids plenty of healthy food.

19/
Do the grocery shopping. Plans the meals. Stock the fridge. Cook dinner. And of course, do the dishes and keep the kitchen clean because you don’t want harmful bacteria taking over.

20/
Man: But. I mean. I don’t even know how to cook.

God: How did you learn about your weapons?

Man: Youtube.

God: Are there cooking videos on Youtube?

Man:

[End of conversations]

21/
I'm often told that men have instincts to protect their family and how Protector is their natural role.

I think the case can be more easily made that men have zero natural instincts to protect their family.

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If such an instinct had evolved, why wouldn't men check back with any woman they’d had sex with, to see if they'd caused a pregnancy?

How can we say men have an instinct to protect their family when there are children the world over with fathers who have no idea they exist?

23/
It’s much easier to argue that mothers have a strong instinct to protect their families. Mothers still do the bulk (by far the bulk) of the parenting. Which means mothers do the real things that actually protect their kids every day all day long.

24/
Men demanding guns for their role as protector-of-the-family are full of it. They are only willing to protect in make-believe instances that are never likely to happen. When asked to *actually* protect their family, by doing something like laundry, they can’t be bothered.

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guns  religion  toxicmasculinity  genderroles  twitterthread  by:gabrielleblair 
6 weeks ago by dirtystylus
Amaryah S. Armstrong on Twitter: "I always laugh when ppl talk abt being gay isn't a choice bc why would you choose it, but have these ppl looked at heterosexuality lately? All the work that goes into compulsory heterosexuality makes sense bc how else wou
I always laugh when ppl talk abt being gay isn't a choice bc why would you choose it, but have these ppl looked at heterosexuality lately? All the work that goes into compulsory heterosexuality makes sense bc how else would you get ppl to be straight? lmaoooo
sexuality  gender  genderroles  lgbtq 
september 2019 by dirtystylus
Hermione Granger: More Than a Sidekick | Tor.com
Hermione Granger is his antithesis. She’s a muggle-born witch who arrives at Hogwarts prepared to dominate magic. She’s enormously ambitious, but consistently seeks to elevate others when she could easily let them fail. She walks beside Harry even when doing so means putting up with relentless scorn from the people who waver between hating him and worshiping him—even when that scorn is piled on top of the blood-status slurs she weathers continuously throughout the series. She stands up against a centuries-long institution of interspecies slavery, even when doing so means that everyone she cares about will laugh at her. She skips her final year of school in order to help Harry and Ron find the horcruxes, even though it could mean losing every opportunity she’s spent the previous six years working for. She chooses her causes over her ambitions every time, and she swallows the consequences because they’re worth it to her.
hermionegranger  harrypotter  sexism  genderroles  fiction  culture  feminism 
september 2016 by dirtystylus

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