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robertogreco : disappointment   9

Raising a Teenage Daughter* — The California Sunday Magazine
"by Elizabeth Weil *with comments and corrections by Hannah W Duane
photograph by Tabitha Soren"

[from the annotations]

"Parents underestimate kids’ ability to figure out what is right for them. My parents originally thought the public arts high school where I just started would be a terrible choice, and now they understand how perfect it is for me."



"I receive, on average, a dozen book titles when I ask for a recommendation from my parents. It would be impossible to read them all. Plus, I want to choose what to focus on and file the rest away. Parents seem to need immediate return on their advice and assume no ideas get recorded for later use."



"Well, I wanted to know everything, back when that seemed reasonable, and I thought adults knew and understood everything, so it made sense to ask. Back then, all of my questions had answers."



"Adults think that kids are going to break if they hear something bad has happened. However, from a fairly young age kids know that terrible things happen, and they know when someone is trying to shelter them. It’s like when I was 4 and I found a dead robin on my grandparents’ deck, and my parents told me, “The bird is done being a bird.” That was OK, but it would have been OK, too, to just say the bird was dead. If you allow a kid to believe that things live forever, it’s going to be a worse experience later because they’re going to learn they were lied to."



"I think this is a complex point. It’s old-fashioned and sexist to think clothing is a major indicator of values. People should be able to wear what they want without worrying about others’ feedback."



"Everyone is “pretty flawed.” Isn’t the whole idea that you grow up and realize nobody is perfect and learn to live with the ways you’re messed up?"



"In my daily life, I take almost no risks. I do my homework; I’m absurdly early to most things. The mountains are the one place where I can relax and take advantage of this calm. I don’t know if I want a risk manager. I want to get better at accepting risk. It’s hard to learn, especially when your parents are cautious people themselves and you have anxiety about disappointing them. And yourself."



"I know my life is going to take some trial and error. I know I need to make the mistakes, and I know I’m going to be humiliated. I’m trying to gather up my courage. People can tell you to take deep breaths, they can tell you to close your eyes, but they can’t make you calm."
teens  parenting  daughters  2017  elizabetheil  hannahduane  annotation  families  children  childhood  death  growingup  adolescence  anxiety  adults  risk  risktaking  disappointment 
december 2017 by robertogreco
On Being Let Down: iPhone 6 and the Politics of Disappointment — Medium
"And what we see now is, I believe, the opening of another sigh of great disappointment. Religion, drugs, space travel and digital culture: all of it has let us down. All of it left us disappointed.

***

It runs deep.

Capitalism promised great leisure and riches. We have been let down.

Politics promised great change. We have been let down.

Look at the fall-out from the Scottish referendum on independence. Look at the young men going to fight with IS. Look at political apathy and the overriding sense of cynicism. We are living in an age of almost universal disappointment.

In the 1580s Montaigne wrote that ‘to philosophise is to learn how to die.’ He could perhaps have written that it was to learn to deal with disappointment. Death, at its core, presents itself as the fundamental disappointment: after all that, is this it? Dust, rising for such a short while, only to return to dust?

The key question of our time is then this: how can we move beyond disappointment? In Montaigne’s terms, is there life after this death? Once we have faced up to the inevitability of our fall back into the earth, how do we then live? It’s to this question of resurrection — this ‘rising again’ — that Getting High turns as it concludes. The book is something of a memoir too in that this journey through religious, hedonistic, technological and political disappointment — and beyond — is a very personal one.

I don’t want to say too much more here — I’ll save your disappointment for when you read the final version — but suffice to say I believe that there is hope. But before that hope there what I believe we must do is get beyond denial. To accept not just that the iPhone 6 is disappointing, but that every other one will be too, and that all of these devices, all of our contrivances, all of our gadgets, all of our grand schemes and plans, all of it is going to let us down, just as certainly as we will be let down on straps into a hole in the ground some day, just as certainly as we will watch others being let down too.

The Apple is rotten; the promise of omniscience and immortality has turned out to be false. So then, how shall we live?"

[Also posted here: http://www.kesterbrewin.com/2014/09/26/on-being-let-down-iphone-6-and-the-politics-of-disappointment/ ]
kesterbrewin  2014  disappointment  capitalism  latecapitalism  meaning  meaningmaking  consumerism  materialism  hope  montaigne  philosopy  change  politics  religion  purpose  emptiness  iphone  iphone6  death  mortality  omniscience  immortality  micheldemontaigne 
october 2014 by robertogreco
Conan O’Brien’s Dartmouth Commencement Address ... - AUSTIN KLEON : TUMBLR
"whole address is so good, but I keep coming back to… [part] about how failure to perfectly copy our heroes leads to finding our own voice…

"Way back in the 1940s there was a very, very funny man named Jack Benny. He was a giant star, easily one of the greatest comedians of his generation. And a much younger man named Johnny Carson wanted very much to be Jack Benny. In some ways he was, but in many ways he wasn’t. He emulated Jack Benny, but his own quirks and mannerisms, along with a changing medium, pulled him in a different direction. And yet his failure to completely become his hero made him the funniest person of his generation. David Letterman wanted to be Johnny Carson, and was not, and as a result my generation of comedians wanted to be David Letterman. And none of us are. My peers and I have all missed that mark in a thousand different ways. But the point is this : It is our failure to become our perceived ideal that ultimately defines us and makes us unique.""
conano'brien  dartmouth  creativity  voice  identity  humor  2011  change  mannerisms  johnnycarson  davidletterman  jackbenny  failure  copying  mimicry  quirkiness  personality  mutations  babyboomers  uniqueness  success  nietzsche  disappointment  socialmedia  innovation  spontaneity  satisfaction  convictions  fear  reinvention  perceivedfailure  self-defintion  clarity  originality  commencementspeeches  boomers  commencementaddresses 
june 2011 by robertogreco
Borderland › Let There Be Gridlock
"I don’t know if it’s the “end of the age of Obama.” If this is a new age, I’ve never seen Obama carrying the banner for it. We need to get over the idea that “leaders” will save us from the evils of the world, and find ways to make changes closer to home on ourown. "
dougnoon  barackobama  2010  elections  local  politics  policy  leadership  grassroots  disappointment 
november 2010 by robertogreco
Education Policies One Reason for the "Enthusiasm Gap" - Living in Dialogue - Education Week Teacher
"Someone recently told me I would be even less happy with what a President Palin might do with No Child Left Behind, so I should be a bit less critical and get with the program. I imagine President Palin might do worse, but honestly I am not sure how. And at least I would not feel as if I were administering the punishment to myself." [via: http://www.tuttlesvc.org/2010/06/ill-take-palin.html]
education  sarahpalin  barackobama  policy  politics  us  disappointment  arneduncan  nclb  rttt 
june 2010 by robertogreco
Why are you so terribly disappointing? [via: http://kottke.org/10/02/everything-sucks-and-were-all-bitter]
"What happened to my bonus? What happened to my job? What happened to my country? Why can't it all go the way it's supposed to go? You mean having a kid won't solve my marriage problems? Why don't these drugs make me feel better? Where's that goddamn waiter with my salad? Have you seen the stupid weather today? Is this really all there is?
culture  politics  news  psychology  humor  pessimism  complaints  disappointment  us  society 
february 2010 by robertogreco
The Obama Disconnect: What Happens When Myth Meets Reality | techPresident
"Obama was never nearly as free of dependence on big money donors as the reporting suggested, nor was his movement as bottom-up or people-centric as his marketing implied. And this is the big story of 2009, if you ask me, the meta-story of what did, and didn't happen, in the first year of Obama's administration. The people who voted for him weren't organized in any kind of new or powerful way, and the special interests--banks, energy companies, health interests, car-makers, the military-industrial complex--sat first at the table and wrote the menu. Myth met reality, and came up wanting. … Nor, it is clear, was Obama's campaign ever really about giving control to the grassroots. … Plouffe and the rest of Obama's leadership team, wasn't really interested in grassroots empowerment. Instead, they think they've invented a 21st century version of list-building … Obama's compromises to almost every powers-that-be are tremendously demotivating"
via:preoccupations  technology  internet  barackobama  elections  2009  critique  corporations  hypocrisy  grassroots  disappointment  strategy  corruption  finance  2008  activism  collaboration  banking  ethics  media  democracy  history  politics  us  commentary 
january 2010 by robertogreco
It’s been over a year since Obama was elected and while its an immense relief to be rid of the... | varnelis.net
"...awful regime that laid waste to this country for eight years, the disappointment about the current administration is starting to set in. I’ve been cautious from day one since I remember just how stupid the Clinton administration really was and observed that during the election Obama never offered compelling policies to match his oratory.
larrysummers  barackobama  harbard  finance  policy  us  politics  government  presidency  kazysvarnelis  disappointment  2009 
december 2009 by robertogreco

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