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robertogreco : haters   4

The Benjamin Franklin Effect: The Surprising Psychology of How to Handle Haters | Brain Pickings
"In sum, we are excellent at deluding ourselves, and terrible in recognizing when our own perceptions, attitudes, impressions, and opinions about the external world are altered from within. And one of the most remarkable of manifestations of this is the Benjamin Franklin Effect, which McRaney examines in the third chapter. The self-delusion in question is that we do nice things to people we like and bad things to those we dislike. But what the psychology behind the effect reveals is quite the opposite, a reverse-engineering of attitudes that takes place as we grow to like people for whom we do nice things and dislike those to whom we are unkind."
ethics  benjaminfanklin  behavior  bias  kindness  preference  preferentialtreatment  psychology  benjaminfranklineffect  haters  attitudes  self-delusion  via:ayjay 
april 2014 by robertogreco
“It wasn't for me.” - Austin Kleon
"I’ve become fond of the phrase “it wasn’t for me,” when referring to books (music, movies, etc.) that I don’t get into.

I like the phrase because it’s essentially positive: underlying it is the assumption that there is a book, or rather, books, for me, but this one just wasn’t one of them. It also allows me to tell you how I felt about the book without me shutting down the possibility that you might like it, or making you feel stupid if you did like it.

It just wasn’t for me. No big deal.

And “me” changes, so when you say, “It wasn’t for me,” maybe it’s not for the “me” right now—maybe it’s for future Me, or Me lounging in a beach chair in Jamaica, or Me at fourteen.

Responding to art is so much about the right place and right time. You have to feel free to skip things, move on, and (maybe) come back later.

And you have to be okay with saying, “It wasn’t for me.”"
austinkleon  timing  taste  readiness  2013  filtering  kindness  criticism  haters  notforme  it'snotforme  itwasn'tforme 
september 2013 by robertogreco
Transom » Jad Abumrad
"For some reason, at the beginning, every decision DID feel like life or death… There was a kind of existential dread that hung over the entire endeavor…"

"I used to talk about this period as a time of “benign neglect,” when WNYC was kind enough to leave me alone to suck (because that’s what I needed, a space to be bad without anyone listening)… It wasn’t benign. There was genuine terror involved."

"My own philosophy on storytelling is that people don't want to be told how to feel but they do want to be told what to pay attention to. One of the most basic ways to do this when you're telling a story is to use what's sometimes called a "pointing arrow," or signposting."

"Get comfortable with the idea that you won’t know what’s good until it’s already happened."

"All those people yelling at you? That just means you’re on the right track; that you’re doing your job."

"We’ve decided that the best way to reimagine yourself is to collaborate promiscuously."
storytelling  attention  cv  experimentation  change  growth  collaboration  howwework  interviews  2012  haters  risktaking  creativity  radiolab 
july 2012 by robertogreco
haters and hecklers - a grammar
"I just want to mention: I don’t think it’s a coincidence that the mainstream adoption of the “hater” idea took place during a decade that also saw a massive explosion in people’s access to one another’s lives and opinions. Because I don’t think we as a culture have yet come up with any particularly great coping mechanisms for that explosion."
haters  heckler  commenting  online  etiquette  criticism  constructivecriticism  opinion  maturity  socialmedia  sharing  exposure  celebrities  bullies 
december 2009 by robertogreco

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