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Camilla Power: Did Gender Egalitarianism Make us Human? or, if Graeber and Wengrow won’t talk about sex … 15 March 2018 on Vimeo
"Camilla Power: Did gender egalitarianism make us human? or, if David Graeber and David Wengrow won't talk about sex and gender, it's not surprising they have almost nothing to say about equality or what drives change. Talk given on the picket line in the lobby of the Anthropology Building, 14 Taviton Street, London WC1H 0BW on 13 March 2018, organised by Anthrostrike: students supporting UCU lecturers' dispute.

Responding to Graeber and Wengrow's recent article 'How to change the course of human history (at least, the part that's already happened)' (Eurozine, 2018) and their earlier piece in JRAI 'Farewell to the "childhood of man": ritual, seasonality, and the origins of inequality' (2015), Camilla Power assesses their confusing claims about human 'origins' (or is that rather: some examples of upper palaeolithic archaeology in Europe and some old suppositions about where we come from), and highlights the question of equality as the crucial preliminary for a serious examination of the spread of social inequality. Power shows how, for evolutionary anthropology in this century, the recognition of female strategies and perspectives has become central to the understanding of how humans became what they are. A balance of power between the sexes was critical to the origin of symbolic culture and gender as our species emerged in Africa.

Camilla recommends for further reading:

'Introduction' to Human Origins: Contributions from Social Anthropology, edited by Camilla Power, Morna Finnegan and Hilary Callan, Berghahn, New York/Oxford, 2016
http://berghahnbooks.com/title/PowerHuman

'Egalitarianism and Machiavellian Intelligence in Human Evolution' by David Erdal and Andrew Whiten, in Modelling the Early Human Mind, edited by Paul Mellars and Kathleen Gibson, McDonald Institute, Cambridge, 1996, 139–150
http://researchgate.net/publication/273292486_Egalitarianism_and_Machiavellian_Intelligence_in_Human_Evolution

'Egalitarianism, Evolution of' by Cathryn Townsend in The International Encyclopaedia of Anthropology, edited by Hilary Callan Wiley Blackwell, Oxford, 2018
http://researchgate.net/publication/323126751_%27Egalitarianism_Evolution_of%27_2018_In_H_Callan_ed_%27The_International_Encyclopaedia_of_Anthropology%27_Wiley_Blackwell "
camillapower  egalitarianism  davidgraeber  davidwengrow  inequality  hunter-gatherers  equality  gender  humans  sex  archaeology  power  anthropology  mornafinnegan  hilarycallan  paulmellars  communism  mutualaid  evolution  kathleengibson  cathryntownsend  autonomy  independence  women  feminism  hierarchy  horizontality 
june 2018 by robertogreco
Future Imaginary Lecture: Kim TallBear. “Disrupting Settlement, Sex, and Nature” - YouTube
"Abstract
We live in an era of decimation dubbed the “anthropocene.” Settler-colonial states such as the US and Canada disproportionately consume the world. As we reconsider violent human practices and conceive of new ways of living with Earth in the face of a feared apocalypse, we must interrogate settler sexuality and family constructs that make both land and humans effectively (women, children, lovers) into property. Indigenous peoples—post-apocalyptic for centuries—have been disciplined by the state according to a monogamist, heteronormative, marriage-focused, nuclear family ideal that is central to the colonial project. Settler sexualities and their unsustainable kin forms do not only harm humans, but they harm the earth. I consider how expansive indigenous concepts of kin, including with other-than-humans, can serve as a provocation for moving (back? forward?) into more sustainable and just relations.

Bio
Kim TallBear is an enrolled member of the Sisseton-Wahpeton Oyate in South Dakota. She is also descended from the Cheyenne & Arapaho Tribes of Oklahoma. TallBear originally trained to become a community and environmental planner at the University of Massachusetts, Boston and the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, Department of Urban Studies and Planning (DUSP). She completed in 2005 a Ph.D. at the University of California, Santa Cruz in History of Consciousness. More broadly, she is interested in the historical and ongoing roles of science and technology (technoscience) in the colonization of indigenous peoples and others. Yet because tribes and other indigenous peoples insist on their status as sovereigns, she is also interested in the increasing role of technoscience in indigenous governance. What are the challenges for indigenous peoples related to science and technology, and what types of innovative work and thinking occur at the interface of technoscience and indigenous governance? Into her research she brings collaborations, and teaching indigenous, postcolonial, and feminist science studies analyses that enable not only critique but generative thinking about the possibilities for democratizing science and technology."

[via: https://www.engadget.com/2018/05/21/inside-the-animal-internet/ ]
kimtallbear  anthropocene  kinship  indigenous  us  canada  monogamy  polygamy  marriage  culture  society  property  race  racism  settlercolonialism  colonialism  sexuality  gender  sex  intimacy  relationships  families  resistance 
may 2018 by robertogreco
OCCULTURE: 52. John Michael Greer in “The Polymath” // Druidry, Storytelling & the History of the Occult
"The best beard in occultism, John Michael Greer, is in the house. We’re talking “The Occult Book”, a collection of 100 of the most important stories and anecdotes from the history of the occult in western society. We also touch on the subject of storytelling as well as some other recent material from John, including his book “The Coelbren Alphabet: The Forgotten Oracle of the Welsh Bards” and his translation of a neat little number called “Academy of the Sword”."



"What you contemplate [too much] you imitate." [Uses the example of atheists contemplating religious fundamentalists and how the atheists begin acting like them.] "People always become what they hate. That’s why it's not good idea to wallow in hate."
2017  johnmichaelgreer  druidry  craft  druids  polymaths  autodidacts  learning  occulture  occult  ryanpeverly  celts  druidrevival  history  spirituality  thedivine  nature  belief  dogma  animism  practice  life  living  myths  mythology  stories  storytelling  wisdom  writing  howwewrite  editing  writersblock  criticism  writer'sblock  self-criticism  creativity  schools  schooling  television  tv  coelbrenalphabet  1980s  ronaldreagan  sustainability  environment  us  politics  lies  margaretthatcher  oraltradition  books  reading  howweread  howwelearn  unschooling  deschooling  facetime  social  socializing  cardgames  humans  human  humanism  work  labor  boredom  economics  society  suffering  misery  trapped  progress  socialmedia  computing  smarthphones  bullshitjobs  shinto  talismans  amulets  sex  christianity  religion  atheism  scientism  mainstream  counterculture  magic  materialism  enlightenment  delusion  judgement  contemplation  imitation  fundamentalism  hate  knowledge 
february 2018 by robertogreco
Lorna Simpson, America’s Most Defiant Conceptual Artist, Makes A Radical Change—To Painting - Vogue
"Lorna graduated early from SVA and was doing graphic-design work for a travel company when she met Carrie Mae Weems, a graduate art student at the University of California, San Diego. Weems suggested she come out to graduate school in California. “It was a rainy, icy New York evening, and that sounded really good to me,” Simpson says. “I had no idea what I was getting myself into.” She knew she’d had enough of documentary street photography. Conceptual art ruled at UCSD, and in her two years there, from 1983 to 1985, Lorna found her signature voice, combining photographs and text to address issues that confront African American women. “I loved writing poetry and stories, but at school, that was a separate activity from photography,” she says. “I thought, Why not merge those two things?”"
lornasimpson  2018  art  artists  adjaye  painting  photography  multimedia  ucsd  conceptualart  davidhammons  jean-michelbasquiat  basquiat  zoracasabere  combinations  breakingform  cross-media  race  gender  sex  identity  video  videoart  form 
february 2018 by robertogreco
This Children's Book About Sex And Gender Is A Total Game-Changer
"Sex is a Funny Word is nothing short of revolutionary. Cory Silverberg and Fiona Smyth's newest book is brilliant in its approach to giving caregivers and educators the tools they need to talk to kids about their bodies. Not only is it "the first trans-inclusive book for kids," but it also uses inclusionary language and diverse representation across race, ability, gender, and sexuality, to hone in on the most important aspects of discussing sex and bodies with kids aged 8-12. It is the second in a trilogy of books – the first, What Makes a Baby, is a beautiful, balanced, and many-gendered explanation of baby-making for kids aged 5-8.

(While Sex is a Funny Word discusses body parts, gender, touch, and other topics related to the word “sex,” it doesn’t delve into reproduction — intercourse is being reserved for the third book, planned for release in fall 2017, which will be geared toward older kids.)

Sex is a Funny Word is revolutionizing the way caregivers can talk to kids about their bodies."



"Although I could have made this a list of the 7,000 things that Sex is a Funny Word does to revolutionize talking to kids about their bodies, out of respect for everyone's time I’ve narrowed it down to ten. It was really hard to do.

1. Representation of all bodies should be the norm, rather than an exception.



2. Honesty + information = kids’ confidence.



3. Gender is complicated… and kids know it!



4. Conversation > silence.



5. "Justice" is an essential word when speaking about bodies.



6. Privacy isn’t just for grown-ups.



7. Consent matters at every age."
books  children  sex  gender  consent  justice  privacy  bodies  conversation  silence  honesty  information  representation  sexed  parenting  corysilverberg  fionasmyth  2015  body 
january 2018 by robertogreco
America Made Me a Feminist - The New York Times
"I used to think the word “feminist” reeked of insecurity. A woman who needed to state that she was equal to a man might as well be shouting that she was smart or brave. If you were, you wouldn’t need to say it. I thought this because back then, I was a Swedish woman.

I was 9 when I first stepped into a Swedish school. Freshly arrived from Czechoslovakia, I was bullied by a boy for being an immigrant. My one friend, a tiny little girl, punched him in the face. I was impressed. In my former country, a bullied girl would tattle or cry. I looked around to see what my new classmates thought of my friend’s feat, but no one seemed to have noticed. It didn’t take long to understand that in Sweden, my power was suddenly equal to a boy’s.

In Czechoslovakia, women came home from a long day of work to cook, clean and serve their husbands. In return, those women were cajoled, ignored and occasionally abused, much like domestic animals. But they were mentally unstable domestic animals, like milk cows that could go berserk you if you didn’t know exactly how to handle them.

In Sweden, the housekeeping tasks were equally divided. Soon my own father was cleaning and cooking as well. Why? He had divorced my mother and married a Swedish woman.

As high school approached, the boys wanted to kiss us and touch us, and the girls became a group of benevolent queens dispensing favors. The more the boys wanted us, the more powerful we became. When a girl chose to bestow her favors, the lucky boy was envied and celebrated. Slut shaming? What’s a slut?

Condoms were provided by the school nurse without question. Sex education taught us the dangers of venereal diseases and unwanted pregnancy, but it also focused on fun stuff like masturbation. For a girl to own her sexuality meant she owned her body, she owned herself. Women could do anything men did, but they could also — when they chose to — bear children. And that made us more powerful than men. The word “feminist” felt antiquated; there was no longer a use for it.

When I moved to Paris at 15 to work as a model, the first thing that struck me was how differently the men behaved. They opened doors for me, they wanted to pay for my dinner. They seemed to think I was too delicate, or too stupid, to take care of myself.

Instead of feeling celebrated, I felt patronized. I claimed my power the way I had learned in Sweden: by being sexuality assertive. But Frenchmen don’t work this way. In discos, I’d set my eye on an attractive stranger, and then dance my way over to let him know he was a chosen one. More often than not, he fled. And when he didn’t run, he asked how much I charged.

In France, women did have power, but a secret one, like a hidden stiletto knife. It was all about manipulation: the sexy vixen luring the man to do her bidding. It wasn’t until I reached the United States, at 18, and fell in love with an American man that I truly had to rearrange my cultural notions.

It turned out most of America didn’t think of sex as a healthy habit or a bargaining tool. Instead, it was something secret. If I mentioned masturbation, ears went red. Orgasms? Men made smutty remarks, while women went silent. There was a fine line between the private and the shameful. A former gynecologist spoke of the weather when doing a pelvic exam, as if I were a Victorian maiden who’d rather not know where all my bits were.

In America, a woman’s body seemed to belong to everybody but herself. Her sexuality belonged to her husband, her opinion of herself belonged to her social circles, and her uterus belonged to the government. She was supposed to be a mother and a lover and a career woman (at a fraction of the pay) while remaining perpetually youthful and slim. In America, important men were desirable. Important women had to be desirable. That got to me.

In the Czech Republic, the nicknames for women, whether sweet or bitter, fall into the animal category: little bug, kitten, old cow, swine. In Sweden, women are rulers of the universe. In France, women are dangerous objects to treasure and fear. For better or worse, in those countries, a woman knows her place.

But the American woman is told she can do anything and then is knocked down the moment she proves it. In adapting myself to my new country, my Swedish woman power began to wilt. I joined the women around me who were struggling to do it all and failing miserably. I now have no choice but to pull the word “feminist” out of the dusty drawer and polish it up.

My name is Paulina Porizkova, and I am a feminist."
paulinaporitzkova  us  feminism  france  sweden  sex  gender  sexuality  sexed  sfsh  czeckrepublic  czechoslovakia  equality  women 
june 2017 by robertogreco
Learning / Sex — Carol Black
"Many of us have difficulty explaining the concept of unschooling, life learning, or self-directed learning to those who are unfamiliar with it. In an attempt to help unschoolers communicate their way of looking at things to the wider community, we have come up with the following helpful worksheet in two parts.

PART 1

To understand how unschoolers view education, simply take these common and widely held beliefs about sex, and replace the word "sex" with the word "learning."

1. The desire for _______ is a powerful human drive which expresses itself naturally at the developmentally appropriate time. It's important that young people are able to begin _______ when they feel ready and not when someone else pressures them to begin.

2. If people feel scrutinized, measured, or assessed during _______ it can take the fun out of it pretty fast.

3. It's not good manners to compare one person's performance in _______ to another person's. Any kind of scoring system that uses letters or numbers to rate a person at _______ would be wildly inappropriate.

4. While some people don't mind being watched, reprimanded, or threatened with punishment during _______, most people’s enjoyment of _______ tends to wane under those conditions.

5. When it comes to _______, people are all different. Anyone who tries to tell you that one kind of _______ is "normal" and another kind of _______ is a "disorder" should be viewed with skepticism.

6. Having a preconceived set of objectives can tend to take the pleasure out of _______. Sometimes it’s better to just dive into _______ and see where it goes.

7. Research shows that _______ performed for rewards such as money, food treats, praise, or trips to Disneyland is not the same as _______ engaged in for its own sake.

8. The right to personal choice in matters of _______ is fundamental to human dignity and happiness.

9. Sometimes _______ that takes a long time is even better than _______ that happens really fast.

*******

PART 2:

To understand how unschoolers view current education policy, simply take the following common statements about education and replace the word "learning" with the word "sex."

1. All students must be prepared to begin _______ by the same age, which will be determined on a statewide basis by a qualified panel of experts.

2. Students should not be allowed to fall behind their peers in ________ . Those who do must be identified as early as possible so that they can receive immediate professional intervention, including medication if necessary.

3. Students must master the skills for _______ in sequence, with the basic building blocks for _______ mastered and tested before higher-order _______ can begin.

4. The normal way to begin _______ is in a classroom using textbooks and worksheets rather than through experimentation and hands-on experience.

5. _______ is better in groups of 20 or 30 than one on one.

6. _______ should be scheduled in 45 minute sessions that begin and end promptly with the ringing of a loud bell.

7. It is not permitted to use the bathroom during _______ . Texting and snacking are also strictly forbidden.

8. Students should be given a clear rubric for _______ that tells them how many points will be earned for each _______ activity, as well as the criteria for scoring. Also make it clear how many points will be taken off for sloppiness or lateness.

9. Students’ progress at _______ should be constantly evaluated on a percentile basis, with their rank among their peers posted on a bulletin board in the hallway.

10. Parents can reward excellence in _______ by proudly putting a bumper sticker on their car announcing that their child is better than other people's children at _______.

11. The U.S Department of Education, through the use of federally mandated standards, intends to ensure that in the 21st century all American students achieve minimum performance levels at _______, so that we will be able to compete with the Chinese.

Congratulations!

Now you know how to think like an unschooler!"
carolblack  unschooling  deschooling  education  learning  howwelearn  nealmarlens  humor  sex  measurement  standardization  development  motivation  enjoyment  joy  dignity  policy  competition  ranking  rankings  howweteach  teaching 
may 2016 by robertogreco
Why Isn't Sex Education a Part of Common Core? - Pacific Standard
"Maybe it's not politically feasible, but most kids will need sexual knowledge more than Shakespearean verse to be functioning adults. Here's a sample curriculum."
2015  alicedreger  sex  sexed  education  pleasure  commoncore  sexuality  parenting  teaching 
april 2015 by robertogreco
I Took a Christian Virginity Pledge As a Child And It Nearly Destroyed My Life | Alternet
"I'm now thoroughly convinced that the entire concept of virginity is used to control female sexuality."
2014  samanthapugsley  abstinence  education  sex  sexed  virginity  sexuality  parenting 
april 2015 by robertogreco
Why Schools Can’t Teach Sex Ed in the Internet Age
"But school board members contend that 9th grade students have already been exposed to the contents of the book—and much, much more. They argue that even relatively modern sex ed has even not begun to reckon with what kids are now exposed to in person and online.

The singer Rihanna, for example, has legions of young fans. Her music video for the song “S&M”—viewed more than 57 million times on YouTube so far—shows the artist, pig-tied and writhing, cooing “chains and whips excite me.” It then cuts to her using a whip on men and women with mouths covered in duct tape.

“I think denying that [sex] is part of our culture in 2014 is really not serving our kids well,” says Lara Calvert-York, president of the Fremont school board, who argues that kids are already seeing hyper-sexualized content—on after school TV. “So, let’s have a frank conversation about what these things are if that’s what the kids need to talk about,” she says. “And let’s do it in classroom setting, with highly qualified, credentialed teachers, who know how to have those conversations. Because a lot of parents don’t know how to have that conversation when they’re sitting next to their kids and it comes up in a TV show. Everyone is feeling a little awkward.”

But the Fremont parents aren’t budging. “Any good parent monitors what their child has access to,” says Topham. “We don’t say, ‘they’re going to drink anyway, let’s give them a car with bigger airbags.’” The parents note that the book was actually written for college students, and refers to college-related activities like bar crawls. (While acknowledging this, the book’s author Sara L. C. Mackenzie, believes it’s appropriate for high schoolers; her children read it at 13.)

The book has been shelved, at least for this year. But the problem isn’t going away. The Fremont showdown is a local skirmish in what has become a complicated and exhausting battle that schools and parents are facing across the nation. How, when, and what to tell kids about sex today? TIME reviewed the leading research on the subject as well as currently available resources to produce the information that follows, as well as specific guides to how and when to talk to kids on individual topics."



"On paper, the United States is checking all the right boxes of managing teen sexual behavior. The national pregnancy rate is at a record low and it appears teens are waiting longer to have sex, and those that are sexually active are using birth control more than previous years. But these numbers only tell a tiny snippet of the story.

“Sex education in the U.S. has only gotten worse,” says Victor Strasburger, an adolescent medicine expert and distinguished professor of pediatrics at the University of New Mexico School of Medicine. “Most of the time they don’t talk about contraception, they don’t talk about risk of pregnancy, STIs [sexually transmitted infections]—certainly not abortion. At some point you would think adults would come to their senses and say hey we have to counteract this.”

Strasburger says the U.S. shouldn’t base success on its teen pregnancy numbers: “Everyone else’s teen pregnancy rate has gone down too. Before we pat ourselves on the back, we should acknowledge that we still have the highest rate in the Western World.”

Not only does sex education still virtually not exist in some areas of the country, but school programs that do teach kids about what used to be called the facts of life start too late. A recent CDC study showed that among teens ages 15-17 who have had sex, nearly 80% did not receive any formal sex education before they lost their virginity. Or, if they did, it was only to discourage them from being sexually active. “Parents and legislators fail to understand that although they may favor abstinence-only sex education (despite the lack of any evidence of its effectiveness), the media are decidedly not abstinence only,” reads a 2010 American Academy of Pediatrics policy statement.

“I had sex with my older boyfriend at 16,” says Ashley Jones, 22, a young Georgia woman. “Suddenly my dad wanted to talk about the birds and the bees. I was like, what? It’s too late!” (The Kinsey institute puts the average age that kids have first have sex at 16.9 for boys and 17.4 for girls.)

Current sex education, where it does exist, often teaches the basic plumbing, but it’s not answering the questions young people really have when it comes to sexuality: What should I do when my girlfriend/boyfriend is pressuring me to have sex? What on earth was happening in that video I probably shouldn’t have clicked online? What do I do when my best friend tells me they’re gay—or I think I am?

School-wide sex education largely ignores gay men and women. “I think the Internet is one of the most commonly used sources for young LGBT folks to gain information,” says Adrian Nava, 19, who says his question about same sex relationships in his Colorado high school sex ed class that was shot down by the teacher. “In some ways it’s great because online forums tend to be supportive and positive. But there’s so much misinformation that reinforces negative feelings.”

Sex ed courses tends to hyper-focus on the girls. “Girls are the ones who have babies,” says Victoria Jennings, director of the Institute for Reproductive Health at Georgetown University, whose research has shown there are globally more programs developed to help young girls navigate their sexuality than to help boys. Given the fact that recent CDC literature shows 43.9% of women have experienced some form of unwanted sexual violence that was not rape, and 23.4% of men have experienced the same, public health experts agree both sexes need education on appropriate behavior.

It doesn’t help that the two groups are getting quite different messages. “The way we talk to boys is antiquated and stereotypical,” says Rosalind Wiseman, educator and author of Queen Bees and Wannabes, about teen girls and Masterminds and Wingmen, on boys. “There’s an assumption that they’re insensitive, sex-crazed, hormone-crazed. It’s no surprise that so many boys disengage from so many conversations about sex ed.”

We teach girls how to protect themselves, adds Wiseman, and their rights to say yes and no to sexual behaviors. But we don’t teach boys the complexities of these situations or that they’re a part of the conversation. “We talk to them in sound bites: ‘no means no.’ Well, of course it does, but it’s really confusing when you’re a 15-year-old boy and you’re interacting with girls that are trying out their sexuality,” she adds. Data show that boys are less likely than girls to talk to their parents about birth control or “how to say no to sex,” and 46% of sexually experienced teen boys do not receive formal instruction about contraception before they first have sex compared to 33% of teen girls.

Yet completely reshaping the sex education landscape is currently almost impossible, not just because of disagreements like the one in Fremont, but because schools lack resources. There’s historically large funding for abstinence-only education, but supporters of comprehensive sex education—which deals with contraception, sexually transmitted diseases and relationships—face significant logistical and financial barriers."
sexed  children  adolescence  media  teens  behavior  sexuality  trust  2014  alexandrasifferlin  controversy  pressure  relationships  emilyweinstein  victorstrasburger  socialmedia  sexting  parenting  myths  pornography  education  policy  politics  curriculum  sex 
november 2014 by robertogreco
The sex ed gap - The Washington Post
"A few years ago the National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy released a study based on survey data about young unmarried adults’ use of and knowledge about contraception. The ignorance and misperceptions are often shocking. I asked the organization if they could sort responses by socioeconomic class of the respondents; they didn’t have income data, but they did have information about respondents’ educational attainment, which tends to be a good proxy for income and employment prospects.

The numbers were disappointing pretty much across the board, but they tended to be worse for those with less education. Twenty-somethings with college degrees report using birth control much more consistently than people with no more than a high school diploma. People with less educational attainment were also much more likely to say they know little or nothing about condoms and the pill. And the amount of mistrust, misinformation and old-wives’-taling about birth control was astounding among the less educated, though not wholly absent among college grads."
sexed  pregnancy  2014  education  sexuality  sex  parenting 
october 2014 by robertogreco
Proof That Comprehensive Sex Ed Classes Actually Help Kids Put Off Having Sex | ThinkProgress
"Comprehensive sex ed classes that emphasize healthy relationships and family involvement can encourage more middle school students to put off having sex, according to the results from a new study published in the Journal of School Health. The results have big implications for school districts that are trying to decide what type of health classes to offer to kids in sixth, seventh, and eighth grades.

The three-year study was conducted by researchers at the Wellesley Centers for Women, who wanted to figure out whether Get Real — a comprehensive sex ed program developed by Planned Parenthood — has an impact on middle schoolers’ sexual behavior. In order to do that, the researchers tracked a group of racially and economically diverse kids at 24 different schools in the Boston area, half of which implemented Get Real and half of which continued with their existing sex ed programs. Kids were periodically surveyed about their sexual activity.

The results were “quite strong,” according to the lead researchers on the project. The study found that 16 percent fewer boys and 15 percent fewer girls became sexually active by the end of eighth grade after participating in Get Real, compared to the kids who didn’t participate in that curriculum.

It’s particularly significant that Get Real helped both girls and boys delay sex. The previous research into other sex ed programs has been mixed, and hasn’t been able to demonstrate such clear results for both genders.

“It’s certainly a very important and positive contribution,” Sumru Erkut, one of the scholars at the Wellesley Centers for Women who led the research team, told ThinkProgress. “People clap their hands over a program that can reduce HIV infections by four percent. So these numbers can be put in that context… If we can make it more likely that 16 percent and 15 percent of boys and girls will delay sex, that’s wonderful.”

Get Real relies on what’s called a “social-emotional learning approach” to teach kids how to navigate relationships, giving them opportunities to practice their communication skills both in the classroom and at home with their parents. According to researchers, that’s the key. Although many of the schools in the control group did have sex ed curricula in place, and some of them had pretty rigorous standards for their health classes, Get Real still had more of an influence on whether middle schoolers delayed sex.

“It is this particular intervention that made a difference,” Ekrut said. “It’s pretty unique in that it emphasizes relationship skills, and it also has a very strong follow-through for the family activity programs.”

Plus, the study found that the sixth grade boys who completed Get Real‘s take-home assignments, which have a big emphasis on getting parents involved with the subject material, were more likely to delay sex until after eighth grade. That’s because those family activities may help facilitate conversations that parents wouldn’t have known how to handle on their own.

“Research shows that parents tend to talk about sex earlier and more frequently with their daughters than their sons,” Jennifer Grossman, another Wellesley researcher and the lead author of the paper describing the study’s new findings, told ThinkProgress. Get Real may help start to shift that dynamic so boys are getting the same kinds of conversations. Grossman plans to further study the effects of family communication on teens’ sexual health behavior.

“The number one most critical takeaway is the fact that this curriculum works,” Jen Slonaker, the Vice President of Education and Training at Planned Parenthood League of Massachusetts, said. “This is exactly what we want our middle schoolers to be doing, we want them to be delaying sex… It epitomizes Planned Parenthood’s commitment to reduce unintended pregnancies.”

That’s a sharp divergence from the way that social conservatives typically construe Planned Parenthood’s sexual health programming. As the national organization — which is the largest sex ed provider in the country — has become a flashpoint in the fight over abortion rights, anti-choice lawmakers have argued that Planned Parenthood shouldn’t be allowed to provide sex ed in public schools. Republicans in Texas and Louisiana have even suggested that Planned Parenthood is attempting to convince teens to get pregnant so it can perform their abortions.

And more broadly, comprehensive sex ed still remains controversial in some areas. More than half of states in the country don’t even mandate that sex ed needs to be taught in school, and school districts can encounter a lot of resistance when they try to move toward overhauling their health classes on their own. Proponents of abstinence education argue that teaching students about sex is inappropriate and will spur them to become sexually active at an earlier age, even though that’s not what the research demonstrates.

Parents in states ranging from Nevada to California to Kansas have pressured schools administrations to remove certain sex ed materials from the classroom. But Planned Parenthood officials say those adults represent a small minority, according to national surveys that have consistently found overwhelming support for comprehensive sex ed.

“It’s so important for educators, administrators, and parents to remember that 95 percent of parents support sexuality education in high school, and 93 percent support sex ed in middle school. If a parent is supportive of this, they are not alone — they are the vast majority,” Slonaker pointed out. “There’s something reassuring about that.”

Planned Parenthood has already partnered with ETR, an organization that offers science-based health and education products, to distribute the Get Real curriculum materials more broadly. Thanks to the results from the new study, ETR has a pretty compelling pitch on its website: “Research Shows It Works! Students who receive Get Real are less likely to have sex.”"
sexed  education  sexuality  teens  children  adolescence  2014  parenting  controversy  us  plannedparenthood  intervention  getreal  gender  boys  girls  socialemotionallearning  jennifergrossman  socialemotional  sex 
october 2014 by robertogreco
imMEDIAte Justice
"imMEDIAte Justice is a movement to inspire a new, youth-driven media conversation about sex, gender, love and relationships. We are a volunteer-led organization that empowers girls to access truth and create positive sex ed films in a supportive, feminist workshop space. imMEDIAte Justice provides girls with the close community, resources, and training they need to become powerful storytellers and changemakers. Our IMJ Summer Camps create empowered female filmmakers who are writing their own narratives, informing their peers, and changing the face of global media and current sex ed."

"Changing the world, one girl at a time.

We are organizing one girl at a time to transform our sex ed, media and world. At imMEDIAte Justice, we are not afraid to embrace love and pleasure, broadcast truth, and follow our dreams. We play, learn, and work hard to produce fresh, relevant films that empower our peers with the resources and information they need to

think critically and be healthy. imMEDIAte Justice moves sex ed from misinformation to truth, from isolation to community, from restriction to freedom, from insecurity to self-love. When we empower one girl to tell the truth about her life, she lifts her community and becomes a force for health and change."



"Our mission is to encourage girls to imagine a just world by telling their untold stories of gender and sexuality through film. We believe young women can have a strong and positive impact on their communities if given the tools to amplify their voice."
nonprofits  immediatejsutice  gender  queersex  sexed  feminism  losangeles  girls  empowerment  media  sex  sexuality  parenting  nonprofit 
june 2014 by robertogreco
HelloFlo ad: I'll take a period starter kit, please.
"I hate to jinx it, but we may be living in a golden age of menstrual product advertising. The latest example is this video via Jezebel, which is an ad for HelloFlo, a company that sends customers all of their period needs in the mail each month, and also offers care packages. To pitch its $29.95 “period starter kit” for the newly (or about to be) menstrual, HelloFlo crafted an ad that both mocks period parties and kind of makes you want to have one, or at least have your period. Which is no small feat."
sexed  girls  humor  manstruation  2014  sex  sexuality  parenting 
june 2014 by robertogreco
What If We Admitted to Children That Sex Is About Pleasure? - Pacific Standard: The Science of Society
"I realized why my son was confused. He was thinking “accidentally getting pregnant” was like accidentally burning yourself because you didn’t realize the stove was on. “Sweetie,” I explained, “most of the time that people have sex, they’re not having it to have a baby. They’re having it because it feels good. So you can get accidentally pregnant if you’re having sex for pleasure and you don’t use effective birth control.”

He looked shocked. Apparently I had forgotten to mention that sex was not just for making babies.

“Think about evolution,” I added (because he has also been raised a child of Darwin). “If the only motivation for sex was having a baby, we wouldn’t have very much sex, and our genes wouldn’t be passed on very much. But if sex feels good to people or to other animals….”

“Then they’ll have a lot of sex and the genes will get passed down!” he said, finishing the puzzle. I nodded. He went on, “Do you and dad ever do it for that reason?”

“Most of the time we’ve done it or do it, it’s for pleasure, honey.” He looked a combination of fascinated and chagrined. “You know you were no accident. Before that, I went off birth control to get pregnant, and we were so happy when you came into our lives.” He smiled because he could see me tearing up at how much I love him. (Aunty Mame cries a lot of love.)

He hemmed and hawed next, and I got the sense he wanted to know what I meant when I said it feels good. I asked him if he had that question. He said yes. So I said it was kind of like having someone scratch your back in a place that itched, and having them scratch it just right. I said that, after puberty, he’d know what the special itch felt like. He nodded.

So the morning of sex ed, I found myself wondering whether they were going to mention pleasure. Or would it be all about disease and pregnancy, all gloom and doom?

As it turned out, I’m not even sure they mentioned sex at all. Over bagels the Saturday morning following sex ed day, I started my inquiry by asking our son what he learned about HIV. “It’s an inherited disease,” he told me. “You get it from your mother.”

The mate and I sighed. We explained to him that most people get HIV from sex or from dirty needles, and we explained about condoms, and about drug addiction, and about what makes a disease inherited versus contagious. The table of four adults next do us did that thing again; they went silent. We kept talking. Our son asked why they didn’t tell him this stuff at school. The mate explained that adults stupidly think that if you tell children the truth about sex, they’ll have sex earlier than they really should. He added that the evidence indicates otherwise.

And I was off thinking: How funny that we can’t bring ourselves to tell our children the most fundamental truth about sex, that most of the time we have sex, we have it for pleasure. As I watched my son chomp on his peanut butter bagel, I was struck by the thought that I sure have learned from him how a single act of sex can give you pleasure for years to come. I can’t believe he’s supposed to give me a present for Mother’s Day. Many days, I can’t even fathom that he came from sex. He just seems magical."
parenting  sex  sexuality  education  children  sexed  alicedreger  2014  teaching 
june 2014 by robertogreco
3 Things Little Girls Need from Their Fathers | Joyce McFadden
"1. She needs you to respect her body and its capacities.

When she's little, don't avoid using the correct names for her body parts. I saw a discussion about this on "The View," and one of the perspectives was that children are too young to know such "adult" terms. But they're not adult terms. They're anatomical terms. They contribute to self-knowledge, which contributes to a well-being. A study in the journal Gender and Psychoanalysis found that preschool-age girls were more likely to have been taught the word "penis" than any specific word for their own genitals. That isn't fair and it isn't right. If you don't call her elbow her "Over There," then don't refer to her vulva as her "Down There." When we do that, we only stigmatize those parts and make it even harder for our girls to feel pride and ownership over them. And if you're uncertain about the anatomical terminology, invest in the two minutes it will take you to Google it. Your daughter's body image is well worth those 120 seconds.

When she's older, don't shy away from discussions about menstruation, and if you don't understand how it works, educate yourself years before she starts so you can respond to any questions that might pop up along the way. Let her know you're proud of her reproductive functioning. Remember, if it weren't for menstruation, you wouldn't even have a daughter. If the two of you have talked about it from the time she was young, when she's older, you'll already have built a shared comfort level with it. Then, if she asks you to pick up some tampons for her while you're out, rather than having it turn into an awkward moment that would have reflected negatively on her reproductive system, you can simply say "sure," and ask her to write down what kind she'd like. The exchange will be as it should be: natural.

2. She needs to feel close to you throughout your lives together.

Don't go MIA or withdraw from her once she starts to sexually mature. I believe the psychology of this common paternal phenomenon is rooted in how basic it can feel to some men to view women primarily through a sexualized lens. (As Billy Crystal jokes, "Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place.") It can be difficult for men to go from parenting a pre-adolescent girl to finding themselves the father of a young woman with curves.

Remember, that new body is the one your daughter will be living in the rest of her life. Let her know you'll be by her side throughout it all. If you back away, there's a danger she may think it's her fault. She could feel she's losing her closeness to you simply by virtue of being drawn into a biological process she has no power to stop. There's absolutely no way she can stay your little girl just so you can remain comfortable. Sometimes, though, a girl feels caught in this bind and she may sub-consciously feel she has to choose between her human sexuality and your love for her. She may also fear you'll judge her if she ventures into sexual activity. When this occurs, in addition to weakening her bond with you, it can later complicate her ability to have adult sexual relationships without experiencing guilt or shame; it's hard to have a solid sense of personal confidence if you feel like you're being judged or like you're not enough for your parents, just the way you are. As her father, you have the power to make certain she knows your love is steadfast, and that she won't have to choose between your love and her maturation.

3. She needs you as a role model for how she should be treated by boys and men.

No matter her sexual orientation, your daughter will live in a world with boys and men. Pay attention to the way you address her as well as to the way you talk about women. Be thoughtful in the way you speak to your sons about girls and women, and set limits on appropriate language. The tone you set in your home can either negatively complicate how she believes she deserves to be treated by the opposite sex, or it can ground her in her right to be treated respectfully.

Part of that respect needs to include your appreciation of the fact that her sexuality will be about far more than just the dangers of sexually transmitted diseases, unplanned pregnancy and sexual violence. More importantly, it will be about desire, attraction, the complexities of romantic relationships and often, difficult choices. Offer her guidance, but as she experiences these things, healthy parenting will also sometimes involve affording her the same freedom you would want for yourself -- the freedom to follow her own heart and mind.

*****

In my research, one of the most common things daughters said about their fathers was they wish they were more communicative. So, take the risk on behalf of your daughter, and open the door for the two of you to talk about sexual matters. Don't worry if you're nervous -- in fact, cop to it. Tell her you weren't raised to be comfortable talking about sexuality, but that you're going to forge ahead because you never want her to ever question your regard for her wellness and happiness. She won't care if you fumble through it at first. Let her know you understand her sexuality will be an important part of who she is throughout her life and that you want her to always be comfortable in, and proud of, her body.

Let her know she should be treated with the respect she deserves, and that it's your honor, as the first man in her life, to set that bar high."
parenting  sexuality  sex  sexed  communication  girls  2014 
may 2014 by robertogreco
Joyce McFadden: 3 Things Your Little Girl Needs From You That You May Not Realize
"Here are three things your daughter needs from you to build a foundation that will help her feel good about herself now, as a teen and as a grown woman.

1. She needs information on her body.

She can't develop real confidence without self-knowledge; and she can't have self-knowledge if you don't teach her about the female body you share. Don't tell her she has a "down there." If she's old enough to know what her earlobe is, then she's old enough to know what her vulva is. Both the American Academy of Pediatrics and the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry endorse starting the sexual education of children at 18 months. If you want your daughter to be secure enough in her sense of self to hold her own when sexual matters present themselves, this is where it all begins. If you start by simply naming her body parts, you can gradually move on from there and help her deepen her understanding of sexuality as she grows. This way, by the time she's a teen and really needs this information and openness with you, it will already be in place. If you start when she's already a teen, chances are it will be much more difficult to have these conversations, and she may even freeze you out entirely.

2. She needs to be taught to respect her body and its capacities.

Remember, you're her role model. If you aren't respectful of your own body, it will be harder for her to respect her own, and that will make it harder for her to chose partners who will honor it. Don't critique her body, your body or the bodies of other women in front of her. Don't tease her about her looks or her form. Don't make food all about dieting. Don't talk trash about other women, and as she gets older don't let her talk trash about other girls. Teach her about menstruation long before she gets her period, and let her know you have the confidence to discuss anything sexual with the honesty she deserves to have in her relationship with you.

3. She needs to know she can talk to you about anything.

Women in my research shared stories of keeping major sexual secrets from their mothers because they thought their mothers wouldn't be able to "handle it" if they told them. They reasoned, if my mom couldn't even talk to me about normal, healthy sexuality, of course she wouldn't be able to handle more complicated issues. Things girls and women kept from their mothers? Sexual orientation, abortion, sexual abuse, rape, affairs and trouble in their marriages. Instead of having their mothers by their sides, they went through these things alone. If you want your daughter to come to you with what's going on in her life, you have to earn that privilege. She won't feel comfortable or safe talking to you unless you raise her by example. If you want a close relationship with your daughter throughout your lives together, nurture it starting now.

You and your daughter share the same gender. Don't leave her ignorant and all on her own. Teach her to connect to herself and invite her to connect with you."
parenting  sexuality  sex  girls  sexed  2014 
may 2014 by robertogreco
The sex talk that young women should get
"Without a doubt, one of the best Australian dramas on TV right now (and arguably one of the best ever made, period) is Channel Ten’s Puberty Blues. Based on the 1979 eponymous book by Kathy Lette and Gabrielle Carey, it tells the story of two teenage girls growing up on the beaches of Cronulla where sex, drugs and oppressive gender warfare dominate.

The early sexual experiences of protagonists Sue and Debbie are characterised by pleasureless ‘roots’ administered for the most part by boys with no concern for their consent or mutual pleasure. Which is why it’s been so fist-pumpingly wonderful to watch as season two of Puberty Blues sends Sue on a path of sexual self discovery. Portrayed beautifully by Brenna Harding, Sue’s upbringing has the edge on Debbie’s due to the liberal mindedness of her parents.

After a frank discussion with her mother (Susie Porter) in which Sue confesses that “sex is like homework - you hate doing it, but you have to”, she is given a copy of ‘The Joy of Sex’ and told to find one boy who she can discover what to do with together. “Okay,” her mother Pam says. “Now you’re going to choose one, teach him to listen, and then you tell him where to go.”

Watching this tender interplay between mother and daughter reinforced to me just how important it is for us all to be as encouraging of sexual desire in girls as we are with boys. The sex drives of the latter have never been in question; they form the subject of storytelling narratives, jokes and even defences against bad or criminal behaviour.

But girls are given short shrift when it comes to hormones and sexual curiosity. Overwhelmingly, the social message that girls hear is that sex for us is meaningless without love. Rather than choosing a boy, teaching him to listen and telling him where to go, we’re told instead from a young age to be wary of who we ‘give it’ to because ‘boys don’t respect girls who don’t respect themselves’.

All of that places girls in the position of passive bystander to sexual activity. Because what’s not to respect about a woman who knows what she wants, who isn’t afraid to ask for it and who understands that the world of pleasure has more for her than simply negotiating the exchange of sex (a secondary activity) for the receipt of love (the primary goal)?

One of the best ways we can encourage young girls to prioritise their sexual pleasure above that of a wishy washy notion of ‘love’ is to once and for all lose the whispered stigma around female masturbation. The biological aspects of sex education are necessary, but they have to go hand in hand with lessons on pleasure - both the mutual exchange of it and its solitary pursuit. I have hopes that this is changing already, but I still hear far too many women eschewing masturbation, claiming either that they get bored or that if they’ve got the horn they’ll just find someone to have sex with.

Such an exchange happened recently on MTV’s Awkward, a TV dramady that follows the misadventures of high school senior Jenna and her friends. In the season 4 premiere, Jenna is caught masturbating by her parents, both of whom handle it with a healthy mix of embarrassment and encouragement. Later, Jenna’s best friend Tamara asks her if she was really caught ‘tiptoeing through the tulips’ and if she has orgasms. “Why else would I do it?” comes Jenna’s response.

I liked this scene because it normalises masturbation for girls while making it clear that there’s no shame in seeking orgasms. But it’s powerful as well because Tamara’s vocal distancing from the act isn’t enough to mask the fact that she feels like she’s missing out on a fundamental aspect of sexuality.

When she later establishes that her boyfriend has had a 100% success rate with orgasming together, she gets agitated by the fact that her own ‘half-orgasms’ have been accepted as good enough. By the episode’s end, she’s figured some things out with the help of her friends (not to mention her electric toothbrush), and the message is clear - masturbation and orgasms good, repression bad.

Sex with another (or multiple) partners is very different to sex alone - the latter isn’t just a whizzbang way to entertain yourself for a few minutes (or hours, depending on your preference). It’s also a perfect celebration of sexual selfishness and exploration without pressure - two things essential to women to not only understand the ebbs and flows of their bodies but to become more attuned to how to stimulate those things with a partner. After all, if you can’t figure out how to get yourself off, how can you expect someone else to?"

Like Tamara, Sue also goes on her journey of sexual self discovery. As her mother instructs, she finds a boy (Woody) and together they explore open, respectful and adventurous sex together free from judgment or shame. After Sue has her first orgasm, she walks home along the beach contemplating the shift of understanding that’s just happened; her face erupts into the most joyful of smiles, and not a dry eye was to be had in any woman across the land. I wept again when she describes the feeling to her mother - like Rice Crispies exploding on top of a rainbow.

Why wouldn’t anyone want to get all up on that, especially if they can do it alone? We’re packing major heat in our pants, ladies. There’s no shame in spending time tinkering with the engine. Besides, from my many years of experience, I can personally guarantee that a well oiled machine doesn’t take much revving to turn over."
parenting  girls  2014  sex  gender  sexuality  sexed 
may 2014 by robertogreco
Computer as Condom
"He stands up at a village meeting and says directly: "Do you know what a condom is?" The tension mounts faster and faster as he produces one from his pocket and unwraps the package saying: "Watch, I'll show you what you can do with it." Then just as the tension is getting to breaking point he puts the condom to his mouth and blows it up like a balloon. (I've tried it ... they blow up surprisingly big!) While everyone is still paralyzed by shock he ties it off, pulls out a magic marker, draws a funny face on it and tosses it into the crowd. Out comes another condom package. He has a collection of variations of the same theme and pretty soon gets a giggle from his audience.

Once they giggle he says "Thank you" and leaves. That's it! If you come back a year later you find the lesson has had its effect.

I contrast this with a sex education class I witnessed in a school. Teacher produces a diagram showing the plumbing of human genitalia and gives a lesson full of physiological information. I could almost hear him ticking off in his mind the "content" that has to be "covered" in the lesson plan. Meechai didn't teach any of this. Can we call what he did sex education? I say "yes" ... he taught those villagers something far more important than facts, which they probably knew anyway or could find out. He taught them to open their minds to a subject they previously wouldn't let in. He taught them they could play with a topic that previously made them clench their minds into a tight knot."
teaching  howweteach  sexed  seymourpapert  2002  culture  education  play  learning  sex  sexuality  parenting 
january 2014 by robertogreco
Toyin Odutola Studio Blog: We teach females that in relationships, compromise...
"We teach females that in relationships, compromise is what women do. We raise girls to see each other as competitors, not for jobs or for accomplishments— which I think can be a good thing— but for the attention of men. We teach girls that they cannot be sexual beings in the way that boys are. If we have sons, we don’t mind knowing about our sons’ girlfriends, but our daughters boyfriends? ‘God forbid!’ But of course when the time is right, we expect those girls to bring back the perfect man to be their husband. We police girls, we praise girls for virginity, but we don’t praise boys for virginity. And it’s always made me wonder how exactly this is supposed to work out because [laughs] the loss of virginity is usually a process that involves [laughs]….

We teach girls shame. ‘Close your legs!’ ‘Cover yourself!’ We make them feel as though by being born female, they are already guilty of something. And so, girls grow up to be women who cannot say they have desire. They grow up to be women who silence themselves. They grow up to be women who cannot say what they truly think. And they grow up—and this is the worst thing we do to girls—they grow up to be women who have turned pretense into an art form."

—Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

[Direct link to talk: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hg3umXU_qWc ]

"We do a great disservice to boys in how we raise them. We stifle the humanity of boys. We define masculinity in a very narrow way. Masculinity becomes this hard small cage. And we put boys inside the cage. We teach boys to be afraid of fear. We teach boys to be afraid of weakness, of vulnerability. We teach them to mask their true selves. Because they have to be “hard men”."

[Quoted here: http://notgames.tumblr.com/post/77778358006/johnyzuper-we-do-a-great-disservice-to-boys-in ]
chimamandangoziadichie  chimamandaadichie  2013  girls  society  relationships  parenting  virginity  gender  sex  pretense  boys  masculinity  fear  vulnerability  weakness  manhood 
december 2013 by robertogreco
danah boyd | apophenia » Three conversations for parents: navigating networked publics
"…the advice that children need to negotiate networked publics parallels advice that parents have always given when their children encounter public spaces. To address online safety concerns, parents need to help build resilience generally…I encourage parents who are concerned about online safety issues to initiate three important conversations with their children:

Public-ness. Hanging out online is a lot like socializing in any other public space. Youth may be there to socialize with their peers, but teachers and other adults may also be present. What makes the internet especially tricky is that youth leave traces that may be viewed by people at a different time…

Empathy. People often say or do mean things when they themselves are hurting…

Sex and Sexuality. Many parents struggle with the birds and bees conversation, preferring to avoid the topic altogether or hope that offering a book will do…

…many youth are struggling with the things they’ve always struggled with…"
socialmedia  socializing  2012  cyberbullying  timeshiftedreading  networks  networkedtechnologies  pornography  sexting  sexed  somethingsneverchange  themorethingschangethemoretheystaythesame  adolescents  youth  public-ness  behavior  publicbehavior  bullying  empathy  internet  web  online  parenting  danahboyd  sexuality  sex 
september 2012 by robertogreco
The Age of Mechanical Reproduction - The Morning News
"The worst thing that can happen in that room is “failure to produce.” They warn you about it. Men go in and hours later have not come out. They’re sobbing and their arms are sore. Their wives or partners are out in the waiting room, surly from hormone treatments. No one has sympathy for a man who can’t produce. They should have sympathy but they don’t. You do not want to be that guy."
health  medicine  paulford  sex  reproduction  in-vitrofertilization  ivf  fertility  2011  writing 
july 2011 by robertogreco
Jay Parkinson + MD + MPH = a doctor in NYC (I just finished reading Bonk by Mary Roach.  The...)
"I spent 4 years in medical school and 5 years in residency. I went to Penn State for medical school and St. Vincents in the West Village for Pediatrics and Hopkins for Preventive Medicine. I never once received lectures on sex and sexuality. It’s sad to think that doctors must teach themselves something so important to us all. Speaking of that, here are the other topics that were either skipped over entirely or given a blurb in a lecture throughout my nine years of medical training:

• Behavior change
• Diet and nutrition
• Exercise
• Death and dying
• Communication skills
• The business of healthcare in America (aka, how to run a practice)

These are just off the top of my head. What are the others?"
jayparkinson  medicine  education  medicalschool  lifeskills  behavior  diet  nutrition  exercise  death  dying  communication  business  health  healthcare  comments  preventitivemedicine  prevention  sex  sexuality 
july 2011 by robertogreco
FT.com / FT Magazine - Don’t touch me, I’m British
"But though Americans won’t touch strangers, they will talk to them. They will chat to people at neighbouring tables in restaurants, or in line at the supermarket. That conversation doesn’t turn the speakers into friends – a mistake Europeans sometimes make. Generalising grossly: to Americans, conversation doesn’t imply intimacy.

Applying Carroll’s theories to Britons, you understand why foreigners think we are repressed. Americans won’t touch strangers, the French won’t talk to them, but Brits will neither touch nor talk to them. Passport to the Pub, a semi-official guide for foreign tourists to the UK, warns: “Don’t ever introduce yourself. The ‘Hi, I’m Chuck from Alabama’ approach does not go down well in British pubs.”

Nor are Britons permitted to make eye contact…

Latins are luckier. They can touch and talk to strangers even when sober…"
culture  rules  sex  cultureshock  france  germany  finland  uk  english  england  touching  conversation  americans  us  relationships  speaking  talking  kissing  interpersonal  norms  culturalnorms 
march 2011 by robertogreco
Bill Introduced to Defund Abstinence-Only Sex Ed « Human Rights Campaign | HRC Back Story
"Today, Senator Frank Lautenberg (D-NJ) and Representative Barbara Lee (D-CA) re-introduced the Repealing Ineffective and Incomplete Abstinence-Only Program Funding Act, which would end abstinence-only-until-marriage programs once and for all.  HRC has long opposed federal funding for abstinence-only programs because they exclude, or even denigrate, lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) students. These programs are prohibited by law from discussing contraceptive use and exclude, by design, LGBT youth because marriage is unavailable to LGBT individuals in most parts of the country.<br />
<br />
Since 1996, Congress has spent almost $1.5 billion on abstinence-only programs, despite a wealth of evidence that they are ineffective…"
law  us  policy  abstinence  abstinence-only  sexed  schools  money  2011  sex  sexuality  parenting 
march 2011 by robertogreco
National Journal Magazine - Do 'Family Values' Weaken Families?
"The paradox is this: Cultural conservatives revel in condemning the loose moral values and louche lifestyles of "San Francisco liberals." But if you want to find two-parent families with stable marriages and coddled kids, your best bet is to bypass Sarah Palin country and go to Nancy Pelosi territory: the liberal, bicoastal, predominantly Democratic places that cultural conservatives love to hate.
culture  families  politics  religion  sex  sociology  society  values  marriage  demographics  divorce  republicans  democracy  geography  hypocrisy  birthcontrol  us  economics  research 
may 2010 by robertogreco
Report Finds Online Threats to Children Overblown - NYTimes.com
"The Internet may not be such a dangerous place for children after all.

A task force created by 49 state attorneys general to look into the problem of sexual solicitation of children online has concluded that there really is not a significant problem.

The findings ran counter to popular perceptions of online dangers as reinforced by depictions in the news media like NBC’s “To Catch a Predator” series. One attorney general was quick to criticize the group’s report.

The panel, the Internet Safety Technical Task Force, was charged with examining the extent of the threats children face on social networks like MySpace and Facebook, amid widespread fears that adults were using these popular Web sites to deceive and prey on children.

But the report concluded that the problem of bullying among children, both online and offline, poses a far more serious challenge than the sexual solicitation of minors by adults."
tcsnmy  socialnetworking  teens  youth  cyberbullying  education  facebook  parenting  politics  safety  security  research  internetsafety  bullying  censorship  children  culture  internet  online  thekidsareallrigh  law  sex  fear  society  2009 
january 2009 by robertogreco
In Tangle of Young Lips, a Sex Rebellion in Chile - NYTimes.com
"Chile, long considered to have among the most traditional social mores in South America, is crashing headlong into that reputation with its precocious teenagers. Chile’s youths are living in a period of sexual exploration that, academics and government officials say, is like nothing the country has witnessed before...The parents of most adolescents today never received formal sex education, and sex education materials were destroyed during Gen. Augusto Pinochet's rule. A new sex curriculum was introduced in 1993, but sexual educators say they are struggling to keep up with the avalanche of sex information on the Internet."
chile  youth  teens  children  sex  sexed  education  internet  ponceo  trends  sexuality  parenting 
september 2008 by robertogreco
Op-Ed Columnist - Let’s Talk About Sex - Op-Ed - NYTimes.com [the graphic speaks loudly]
"If there is a shame here, it’s a national shame — a failure of our puritanical society to accept and deal with the facts. Teenagers have sex. How often and how safely depends on how much knowledge and support they have. Crossing our fingers that they won’t cross the line is not an intelligent strategy. To wit, our ridiculous experiment in abstinence-only education seems to be winding down with a study finding that it didn’t work. States are opting out of it. Parents don’t like it either. According to a 2004 survey sponsored by NPR, the Kaiser Family Foundation and Harvard’s Kennedy School of Government, 65 percent of parents of high school students said that federal money “should be used to fund more comprehensive sex education programs that include information on how to obtain and use condoms and other contraceptives.”"
teens  youth  sex  policy  education  sex-ed  absinence-only  us  statistics  pregnancy  teenpregnancy 
september 2008 by robertogreco
Lies We Tell Kids
"We arrive at adulthood with a kind of truth debt...I've found that whenever I've been able to undo a lie I was told, a lot of other things fell into place....It's not enough to consider your mind a blank slate. You have to consciously erase it."
education  parenting  kids  lies  truth  learning  life  children  culture  teaching  philosophy  paulgraham  childhood  bias  authority  youth  psychology  propaganda  productivity  drugs  health  identity  politics  society  sex  power  religion 
may 2008 by robertogreco

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